The white chrysanthemums near the windowpane were swaying tenderly with the composed zephyr flowing past them. It was drizzling outside. I leaned myself upon the wooden rocking chair beside the window. The tea vendor under the shade of the large banyan tree was wrapping up before it started showering heavily. Few children across the street were in a world of their own in making paper boats ready to sail along the thin stream of water. Some passerbies were in hunt of finding a shelter to standby. The drizzling turned into heavy showers. There was an inimitable tranquility all around. My body defied any kind of movement. The eyelids kissed each other. I ran down the memory lane.
How are you beta?
I am fine. How are you feeling Ma?
I am good beta. You are feeling hungry baby.
No ma. I have eaten a lot since morning….bread, boiled eggs, milk, apple juice….
Hm 🙂 I am proud to have you beta.
I know Ma. You are the best Ma in this world. Love you Ma…
Love you too beta..
Rye! Can I ask you something?
Ma..this is too much..
Hm. Can you live without your dad beta?
Rye! Rye! Beta… Can you hear me?
He does not love me Ma?
Tears started rolling down my cheek. Somehow, I managed to bite my lips together. I clutched my fingers tight to the armrest of the chair.
Ma! Stop crying please…I can hear you.
I broke down.
I am sorry beta.
Stop ditching yourself Ma…
I will take care of you well beta….I will give you all the love of this world….I promise…
Ma…I know that very well…Please do not start again.
I wiped my eyes and composed myself.
That is like a good Ma….
Beta… I fought fearlessly for you and will fight until my last breath. It may be against your father, your grandpa, your grandma or against the whole world. This world is very cruel beta…
But do not worry Rye. Your Ma will always be there for you. She will leave no stone unturned to give you a beautiful life.
Why they do not like me Ma?
They are coward beta..coward! They do not love you because you are a girl. They think you are weak. You cannot become their heir. I feel guilty of saying that to you beta. I am a woman myself.
Rye..You know…they forced me to undergo sex determination test.
Oh! What is that Ma?
It tells you whether you are a boy or a girl.
I resisted with all my strength beta…but I could not…I failed. I failed because they threatened to kill you if I do not.
Oh! Ma…they are so bad people. I hate them.
I left your father…I cannot allow this to happen. You are my only hope to live in this world. I did correct na beta..
My dad does not love me a little bit Ma.
He is a coward beta…goddamn coward! How can he be a father of a child? He does not have the guts to stand for his family!
Calm down Ma. I am feeling uneasy.
Oh! So sorry beta. I forgot.
You did outstanding Ma…I should be proud of you Ma.. Not you. Rye will prove all of them wrong Ma….You see…
A few more days beta…a few more days..That is it.
I felt a sudden twitch in my lower abdomen. The pain reached its peak within a flash. I started howling out of that excruciating pain. I seized to feel the rest of the parts of my body.
Ma! Ma! Maaa!
I woke up and stood out hastily from the rocking chair. I could hear a voice, which was steadily catching up its zenith.
Ma! Ma! Maaa!
Rye was crying. I rushed through the stairs towards the washrooms. I could see traces of blood lumps on the floor of the passage leading to the washroom. My feet and hands became numb. My brain seized to judge anything. I dashed through the door. Rye was standing still. There was a splash of blood on her frock. Her eyes were wet.
Oh! Baby…you are fine. I pulled her and grabbed her tightly into my arms. She embraced me around my waist and suppressed her face against my puffy belly. I kissed her on the forehead. I was crying with a smiling face.
My little baby has become a woman. Yippee!