Family Story – Autism:Through My Brother’s Eyes
Photo credit: taliesin from morguefile.com
It’s been kinda rough living with an autistic brother. I love him so much. He is what inspires me to keep going everyday. Every morning I get up, I hear his cheerful voice. To be honest, he has been my only best friend. Never judges me. Never lets me down. I hope to see him bring happiness to this world. Ever since I started school, I noticed people looked at him differently than I did. Many people would give him weird looks because he would make weird noises in public that were unusual. Many kids asked me why he talked funny. I didn’t know how to respond.
I believe that God gave my brother to my family as a gift. It’s only been me and my mother who helped my brother learn from right to wrong most of the time. I’ve always wondered how my brother looked at the world around him. He always smiles and laughs. He learns more and more everyday. At home, I never hear silence. I only hear the joy of laughter and happiness of him. If only I could understand his feelings that happen inside of him.
My brother is extremely smart. Sometimes when I am in the kitchen, I can hear him talking and singing. When he is alone he dances to music and sings. He has his own favorite music. He acts out movies or episodes that he has seen. I hardly see him frown. I believe that he will do something incredible in this world that will show people how fantastic he is. Still today people look at him weird and it bugs me a whole lot. I can feel heat and anger inside of me about to burst out like a bomb. My mother tells me to keep my cool and to let it go. She also tells me those people are missing out on how amazing my brother is!
One day when I was doing my homework, my brother wanted to go for a walk. He asked my mom and she agreed. But before we went out, my mom decided to take a shower and left me in charge. I felt so responsible watching over my brother. All I could see him doing was watching television and dancing. I don’t know what I was thinking but I went into the kitchen. Right when I went back into the living room, he was gone. I felt the room getting dark and heavy. All I could remember was my mom panicking about my brother missing. She ran outside in a flash and started yelling out his name. I was still standing there like an idiot doing nothing. Finally I snapped out of it and ran to the balcony and started screaming his name as loud as I could. I felt hot tears rushing down my face. I felt guilty and ran back downstairs. Everybody was searching for him. I was panicking so much I didn’t know what to do. All I was thinking in my head was if I would ever see my brother again.
About 15 minutes later, I hear that cheerful talking sound I always love hearing everyday. He was back. My mother found him next to a liquor store with the police. She was so happy. They were both hugging and laughing but I was just standing there feeling terrible I let this happen. I starred at my feet until the room was pitch black. All of a sudden I felt warmness rapping itself around me. I opened my eyes and saw that beautiful smile I had ever seen. It was my brother.
After all this time, I still wonder how my brother looked at the world. Did he see it as an adventure? A puzzle that was impossible? I guess I’ll never know until the day I die. I just hope people would look at my brother differently later in life. Until then, I just have to cherish everyday with my family like it’s the end.
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