Forsaken

The bleak winds caressed her soft face, leaving its immaculate touch sending cold vibes throughout her body.

She was at her home in Pennsylvania.
Standing at the window , she fought an instinct to give away to the tears forming in her eyes.
She wiped another tear that fell down with an unanimous effort and clutched the letter in her hand tightly. She knew that she couldn’t hold her tears any longer.

She was alone, abandoned and left fighting a dispute with nothing but her thoughts.
She glanced at the letter again.
It was from her mother who died in an accident.
She had written it well before her death and concealed it in her little closet .
The last time, a couple of weeks ago when Anna had attempted to see it, her mother had caught her grabbling inside the closet and reprimanded her furiously.
Now that she wasn’t there, there was nothing left that was worth withholding anymore.
She inhaled a deep breath and started reading it cautiously for the umpteenth time.

Dear Anna,
I wouldn’t know when you would read this but whenever it maybe, I hope that you’re happy.

Don’t ever think that I was unaware or had forgotten how much you loved me ,ever since your dad left us.

I preferably wanted you to read this when I wouldn’t be there to wipe your tears, so that it would give you the strength to bear the pain of losing me.

Trust me, nothing’s over. Not just yet, at least.
You’ve got a life ahead of you.
Don’t lose hope, Anna.

Anna cried in dismay. The Pennsylvanian breeze blew over her. How would it fathom how disheartened the girl was?
In all her 18 years she hadn’t realized what her life was all about.

When she was eight years, her dad had legally forsaken them.
The little girl, back then was deprived of a father’s love and care. Yet, her mother had given her every little joy with all the strength that she could muster.

She continued reading the pale letter :

Remember the last time I was indisposed and vomited a whole lot of blood at home and told you that I was okay after the hospital visit?
Honestly, I wasn’t.

The doctor had diagnosed cancer in me and I knew that I wouldn’t stay with you longer.

Anna remembered that day. It felt like yesterday. The overwhelming nostalgia smothered the reminiscence of the memories that she had about her mother.

She recollected the moments of that day. How her mother had not spoken about it after the hospital visit. How she had made her little Anna forget the past and live the present happily.

They had played a game of Rummy and after a palatable dinner, departed to their respective beds for the night.
Anna hadn’t forgotten. Even the tiniest moment was unforgotten.
She wouldn’t in the future,
either.

By now, the clouds outside had turned dark and had developed an intractable grey hue .It looked like they wished to embrace the girl and extend their empathy too.
The grey sky predicted that it would rain and she was lost in a sad reverie.There wasn’t anything that could bring her back to her normal self . All that she had was her mother, and now she was gone.
Anna felt like she was being smoldered by the walls of her house. She wanted to sink into the ground and disappear for an eternity.

She flattened the letter on the desk and sat on the chair besides it.
The floorboard creaked beneath her foot, that cried like it were freed from the dungeons of the prisons of silence.

I tried a lot to get your thoughts wayward so that you may never get precarious regarding my health.
I’m sure that I did a great job.
You never seemed to have suspected anything.

“No, you disguised your feelings all the time!” Anna gasped between her tears.

The letter continued..

And so I chose to die. I made it look like an accident. Falling down the cliff was my idea. It was unfortunate, alright.
I didn’t want you to see me suffer. I know that you don’t have anybody but me . It would be hard to go away with you at my side, so I just made it a tad quicker.

Anna’s mother had apparently committed suicide. She knew it. She had speculated it the time the cop said that a car going off the cliff in that area was one of the rarest , unfortunate accidents . It never happened unless it was intended, he had further suggested.

Now that I’m gone, I wish that there was somebody there to comfort and console you.
You would never imagine how hard it is for me, writing this letter

I’m sure its the same with you, reading it though.

I hope that you are blessed with all the joys of life .

Love,
Your mother
P.s. Don’t miss me , Dear Anna

Anna hugged her knees and stifled further tears .
The weather outside had turned cloudy and she assumed that a storm was building. The winds that blew inside the room slammed the windows so she rushed towards them to shut them

To shut herself. From the world.

As she grappled with the tendrils of her hair falling over her eyes, and the slamming windows, she saw a dark figure looming towards the house from a distance . Somebody was on the driveway.

She wiped away her tears and as her hair fluttered in the heavy wind she made her way towards the front porch.

As she opened the door she saw
a familiar man in his late forties.
When he saw her , he gave a tentative weak smile.
She didn’t respond.

“Anna ” he cried,
” I’m your father.!”
” Ever since I left you and your mother , I’ve been hating myself but I could never muster enough courage to come back.
I’m a coward, Anna”

” But, I don’t want you anymore”, Anna said firmly, stifling her emotions.

“Please don’t say that , I have nobody.” He wept.

” and where were you all this while? You left us both forsaken. You didn’t care, did you? “

“I’m sorry, Anna. I will make it up to you.
Your mom might not be there anymore. But she will watch us from wherever she is. She will want you to be happy. It’s not me. It’s you.
She cares about you,Anna”
” I know that I don’t deserve forgiveness but I will try to make it up to you” ,he whispered,
” I will, trust me!”

Anna rushed inside the house with disoriented emotions and a broken heart.
She then grabbed the fragile letter that was lying on the desk where she had left it ,and cried uncontrollably.

__END__