My O-k-tion School

“Did anybody see or hear anything?” the police enquired the throng of onlookers.

Her partially naked body was numb with pain. How long has it been since they threw her out of the van?

“I hear a faint pulse” the nurse alerts the police.

Four or five men lurked at her at the temple past midnight. “Justice…Amu……” victim fades into darkness.

“We know her” Amirthaveni and her husband showed the newspaper to the police officer.

“Do you know her name? Are you both sure?

“Yes, we know her! It is Devi!” Amirthaveni retorts angrily.

“When was the last time…?” the interrogation begins.

A policeman scatters a bag on the table.

“Recognize these items?” he asks them both.

“Yes”, she replies staring at the bed sheet and sarees.

“Any leads so far police officer?” Amirthaveni’s husband interrupts.

“We have a few leads. These were in her bag too” the police officer hands them few notebooks. “I need to make an official entry of our conversations. You both can sit by those windows and read but you can’t take them out” the inspector hands them the chronologically labeled notebooks.

“Thank goodness for the breeze because of these windows” her husband sighs as he sits down. She opens the first notebook – a day’s life filled with vibrant writing:

My name is Devi. I am 10 years old. I live happily with my appa, amma, and akka.

My appa calls me “Maharani” and akka “Rani” He works at Ayya’s farm. Ayya is a nice man. He pays our school fees, buys books and notebooks every year.

Amma works at Amu amma’s house. Amu amma is Ayya’s wife.  Just like Ayya, Amu amma is a nice lady. “Amu amma is a god” amma told us. I think because she looks like the god in the temple.  She wears nice sarees. She gives us food, new clothes for Deepavali, Pongal and birthdays.

“Why did Amu amma give you these clothes, they look new?” I asked amma today. “They have lot of money to buy new things silly girl” amma beat my bottom.

Many kids came to Amu amma’s house today. Me and akka played with them. They are all nice like Ammu amma.

“Look at her beautiful writing and her English!” Amirthaveni’s husband disrupted her reading.

Me and akka like school. I learn new things every day.

“You will be an English teacher like me” my teacher told me today.

Appa got me a new sketch pen set.

“Can you buy me a pattu paavaadai for my birthday?” akka asked amma.

“I want to be an English teacher amma. See amma, I practice writing English” I showed my notebook one day. “You silly girl, you always dream big” she beat my bottom.

I asked amma so many times “why we cannot go inside Amu amma’s house?” Amma told us they are the upper class, not like us.

Amirthaveni smiles wryly and turns to the next page.

Yesterday I asked amma “when I get bigger like you, will I become the upper class?” Silly girl, go play my amma beat my bottom again.

I cried so much today. Someone stole my sketch pens in school today. Appa told me not to cry and he will buy another set next year.

Amma ate something bad because she spit blood.

Amma has changed. Amma is not feeling good. She is tired and sleeps lots.

I don’t know. Amma and Ayya help us but the doctor is a bad man. “We will pay the bill” Amu amma and Ayya told the doctor but he told us he cannot save her. “I thought doctors save life Amu amma” I cried at the hospital.

Amma went to bed today. She didn’t wake up.

The death left them in darkness forever. Amirthaveni didn’t read this book further. “Can I have a

some water please?” she requests an officer.

“Do you have her autopsy report officer?” Amirthaveni asks before she opens the next notebook.

“Not yet. She hit a rock as she fell out of the van. She was in coma until 10:00A.M. She died later. Too much blood loss from her head” the police officer nods his head in disappointment.

Appa changed, he missed amma too. He talked less. “I am not hungry he told us.” He lost weight.

We ate, slept, cried and went to school, missed amma every day.

Appa came home one day and talked something. Me and akka did not understand. Something was wrong with him. He did not smell good. He even scolded us.

“Are we missing a notebook?” Amirthaveni wondered as she read the next notebook.

Akka did not want a pattu paavaadai for her birthday. “I want amma” she cried on her birthday.

Appa did not go to work. He sleeps most of the time.

Appa beat both of us for going to school.

Me and akka even want to run away from home.

Amu amma and Ayya told appa they will put us in a good hostel. He came home and beat me and akka.

I do not practice English after amma died. I only write when I miss her and sometimes I cry and write.

In March appa took us to meet a friend in the town. His friend is a nice man. He gave us good food and gave appa lots of money. We stayed for one day. Next day appa and his friend went out. His friend came back but appa never came back. But appa’s friend is nice. He gave us a dress to wear and told us “be ready in the morning.”

A lady friend came today and told me she will take me to the girl’s hostel. She gave a dress to akka and “be ready” she told her too. I left with the lady friend first to my school. She looked different, not like Amu amma. I didn’t like her. She had too much powder on her face. She had a big pottu. I went to the hostel. There were many girls. They all smiled differently.

“Where is the school? We go to the same school?” I asked the girls. “This is O-K-tion school” they laughed. I wanted my amma, appa and akka. It is a big word. It is a new word for me. The girls made fun of me.

Today I asked the lady friend about akka. “She is fine” she told me. I am bored. No school. I miss akka, amma and appa. I eat, sleep, and play with the girls.

“You can go to school from Monday” the lady friend told me yesterday.

I was excited on Monday. I was ready.

“Be careful, she is new” the lady told the two men waiting in the car. They took me to a big house. They asked me to wait in a big room. I liked the room. It had a big table, nice chair and a big bed. There was a small T.V. too. I wanted to touch it. A man walked into the room and closed the door. He smiled at me and I smiled too. “You have a big house” I told him. But he removed his pant. I laughed at him. I didn’t understand what he did to me. But my body hurt. I cried on my way. As soon as I saw lady friend I told the lady friend. She laughed like amma and told me it will hurt a few days, but she did not beat my bottom.

Tears blur her vision, as Amirthaveni reads the last few pages of the notebook.

I miss my appa, amma and akka. I asked the lady friend “when I can go to school?” She only laughed. I was tired. I want to sleep. But men never let me sleep. I asked lady friend “why these men stay here in the night?”

“You go home and sleep” I told an old man. He told my lady friend. “You say anything to anybody or I will beat you Devi.” I don’t like this new school. I don’t like this lady friend. I miss my school and my teachers. My teachers never beat me. Only my amma beat my bottom always.

I told the lady friend my body hurts. I want to sleep. Now she is not nice. She does not care about me. One morning I woke up and my dress was red. I was scared. Everybody laughed. The lady friend told me “I am a big girl now.” I don’t know what happened. But I think my body changed. “Take this every day Devi” the lady friend told me. “Why?” I asked her. “Because the tablet will make you stronger” the lady friend told me.

I cried today. Lady friend beat two girls. “I don’t need your baby” she kicked their stomach.

Amirthaveni leans on her husband’s shoulder. “I cannot read anymore” she cries, as tears roll down her cheeks. She picks the last notebook. Except for the few pages rest of the notebook is blank.

I went to my house today. But my house was not there. There was a tea shop. Some men sat on the bench. “What happened to appa?” I ask a man. “That man, he left to see his girls one day to the town and never came back. “Who are you? Why you want to know?” he asked me. I look back at the tea-shop. “Come Maharani.” appa is calling me. I walk fast from my house. Akka is running with a stick to beat me. My amma is laughing at me “silly girl run, run.” I cried as I walk away to meet Amu amma. I waited outside for Amu amma.

“There is somebody by the door” a little girl ran towards Amu amma. “Who is it” she asked.

Amu amma looks like the god at the temple. I like her pattu saree.

“Who is it” she asked me.

“Amu amma, me, Amu amma” I cried.

“Devi!” Amirthaveni is shocked by her presence. How are you Devi? “You are big girl now” Amu amma told me like the lady friend. “Where is your akka?” She looked behind me. Where is your father? Where were you all this time Devi? Why you both did not come and see us? Your appa told us you both live like ranis in the new house so you forgot Amu amma these 6 years. “Which standard are you studying Devi?” Amu amma asked me.

I looked and looked at her “how can I tell Amu amma of my O-Ktion school?”

“You look tired. Are you sick? What clothes you wearing Devi?” Amu amma kept asking me. “Stay with Anjala. I am leaving to a wedding. I will be back tomorrow. “Take good care of her” she told Anjala. “Take bath and rest Devi” she told me. Amu amma is nice to me. She gave me a bed sheet and some old sarees.

“Last time we saw our Devi.” Amirthaveni holds back her emotions. She sat heedless to her husband’s rant at the inspector. “How many more lives? Justice…..! The rapist shouldn’……!”

“Why did you not tell me all this Devi? If only….!” Amirthaveni can’t hold her tears from falling.

I left Amu amma’s house. I did not even tell Anjala. She was still sleeping. I am staying at the temple. The temple watchman told me “leave soon.” Where will I go? Amu amma doesn’t know anything. How can I tell Ammu amma? How can I live now Ammu amma? Even my lady friend doesn’t want me anymore because the doctor told her I have AIDS.

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