Hilarious Short Story – Hunger!!
Ronnie woke up. She was startled. Some noise from downstairs woke her up. She quickly grabbed her coat and turned to the other side of her bed. She was surprised. Her husband was not there.
‘Where in the world is he now?’ She thought.
The noise was louder this time. It was from the kitchen. Surely some one was in the kitchen. She quietly got up and opened her bedroom door. She slowly moved downstairs, carefully so as not to slip and make any creaking noises of the old wood which was used for the stairs. Blame it on Rakesh, her husband, she thought for being so cheap and to use such old wood.
‘Maybe this was Rakesh in the kitchen’, she thought. ‘But he is not the kind to sneak of in the middle of the night to kitchen’
‘And where is Rakesh then?’ She was getting irritated by the second. Maybe this was Rakesh in the kitchen.
She quietly tiptoed into the kitchen, where she saw a dark hooded figure stooping in the refrigerator. She flicked on the lights. The Figure quickly rose and turned to her.
“Ashok????? What in god’s name are you doing in my kitchen in the middle of the night???” She shrieked. She was both surprised and scared to see her neighbour.
The man had a half eaten mango in his hand and his mouth was full. There was mango juice dripping from his mouth and his clothes were half covered in mango pulp. He struggled to eat it quickly and in his effort to do so, he made a big gulp to the half eaten mango inside his mouth. It was a big ordeal just to get the mango in to his stomach. And he breathed a sigh of relief just as soon as he did that.
“What are you doing in my Kitchen??” Ronnie shrieked again.
“Shhh….Don’t shout. Rakesh will wake up. I was Hungry Ronnie. So I came here for a little snack!” Ashok answered. His throat still aching from the last effort of gulping a half eaten mango.
Ronnie breathed in and out. ‘Baba Ramdev, Baba Ramdev.’ She thought. She always did that just to calm herself down. Some people have the strangest technique to calm themselves!!
“If you are hungry why don’t you ransack YOUR refrigerator in YOUR house ASHOK!” Ronnie spoke in a cold and threatening voice.
Ashok could almost hear the grinding of the teeth. “My Refrigerator did not have mangoes, Ronnie. So I thought of coming here. It’s not as if this is the first time I did this!!” Ashok gave the most innocent look he could manage.
“What????” The window pane besides Ronnie almost broke. The glasses cracked. She was fuming now. “You have done this before!!”
So this explained a lot of things that were missing from Ronnie’s kitchen from time to time. All this time it was her respected neighbor, Ashok. And where the hell was Rakesh. Why isn’t he coming?
Just then the doorbell rang. Ronnie and Ashok almost jumped. Ronnie looked at the watch. It was 1.30 am. Some one was at the door.
‘Maybe I am dreaming’ Ronnie thought. ‘What is happening tonight?’
She signalled Ashok to stay exactly where he was. Ashok could not have agreed more with Ronnie. His feet were glued to the floor beneath him. Badly shaking though. He was having trouble just to stand still.
Ronnie went to the door. She looked through the keyhole. She saw her neighbor, Ilavati, Ashok’s Wife. Maybe Ila knew that Ashok was in her kitchen. But something else caught her attention. She was holding some one from the collar. She couldn’t see who. She opened the door and she was shocked to see it was her husband, Rakesh. He was holding the pizza in his hand. Half eaten, I might add. And a little messy.
“Your husband was fishing my refrigerator in the middle of the night, in my house.” Ilavati said in a venomous voice.
Rakesh gave a guilty look.
Ronnie was reeling in shock.
“Sorry Darling, I was hungry and they had Pizza today. So I couldn’t control my hunger.” Rakesh gave Ronnie a justification, which was, well, not needed!