A SHORT LOVE STORY

A tale of friendship,love,happiness,tears,memories,and betrayal

It had started to rain and their fight had just ended with him banging the phone right on her face.

“Something is terribly wrong, somewhere but where I can’t seem to place. O God, he’s hurting me!” she thought.

She wanted to go now, get away from this life; the brutal relationship that made her cry those thousand nights. Turning off the light, she forced herself to sleep but she couldn’t, how hard she tried, the memories, the delightful past always came flooding back. The rain made her feel more miserable for it was the embodiment of their love, the epitome of perfect emotions that had for each other as they had thought in the beginning of their relation. Shutting her eyes shut and wanting to bang the mobile phone against the wall for it mocked her stupid-tender heart to call him back.

Every night the drama was the same, they fought bitterly, she cried, he dropped the call on her face and she wept those lone sad tears. It was as though her sobs were her lullaby to sleep. Ugh! Why was she such a ‘softy?’ People took her for granted. Everywhere she looked at her relation, she saw distances and gaps; nothing felt good anymore, nothing touched her any longer. Everything seemed sham, in shambles, and the dreams in rubbles in heaps… Finally drifting off to sleep she slept miserably that night.

This was Maya’s ever such and usual deliberations on her love life that was so sweet and innocent in the beginning but with years, the rust was settling on it and it was turning disastrously bitter. Their relationship had started eight long years back when they both were in their sweet sizzling sixteens, the time when youngsters soar high in the sky with the wings of new thoughts on their freedom and their lives!

“Seriously teenagers should all be locked with their books in and hearts out,” she thought today.

Maturity had crept in and today she thought along other lines but yes no matter what, she could not and did not want to give up on her love; this she was sure about.

The year 2011 was turning out to be very eventful for her. She had to face all those experiences in her love that she had never thought before. Truth is sometimes so hard to grapple with, yet truth is truth and one has to face it somehow! Something was terribly wrong with their relation; it was as though the thread of their love that she was clasping tightly was slowly slipping away.

The relation that they both were so proud of, they both showed off in front of their friends, was appallingly turning sour. Sameer was getting difficult to handle, he was hotheaded, but lately he fired up at everything and snapped at the most trivial stuff. She knew in her hearts of hearts that something was wrong. They both loved each other passionately and they didn’t want to lose each other not after all these years. The egoist boy of sixteen had turned into compassionate man of twenty-four.

Their love story had started from their friendship at tuitions and when they both fell for each other, both of them did not realize it till they both spared every time to be with each other. Their love was gradual process, it was not momentous and spontaneous blind passion, but it grew out of friendship, loyalty, steadfastness, faithfulness, dedication, and support for one another. It was innocent yet strong in its own way. It had stood unfaltering and rock-hard against the adversities and it was hurting Maya to see it crashing and crumbling after all they had built for eight long years.

Maya was an introvert and he, an extrovert and as the saying goes; opposites attract. They began to attend same tuitions, walk together in rain, listen to same music, and finally wound up together on phone. There were no CCDs then but they spent time at small chai-walla stalls, enjoying the garam chai and the passion of togetherness. Life was bliss till Maya’s parents came to know of their affair and they did everything to reproach, condemn, cajole her to give up on the ‘boy.’ In return, she just did two things; cried bitterly and never gave up her love for Sameer.

They met almost every day, talked, profoundly confessed their love for each other, and promised their relationship forever. He dropped her to her home although they became more discreet and careful. From school to college to now university, they became inseparable. Their love had seen both of them grow from naïve children into responsible gown ups. They were elixir for each other, comforting and supporting.

Maya was the girl from every girl’s dream; a pampered and loved child, the only child who got everything before the words uttered from her mouth. The apple of her parents’ eyes, she made her parents proud and happy with her. She was obedient yet rebellious. She had been very timid and introvert in her childhood but the years turned her all bold and tough. A pretty girl who could do anything for her parents but committed a single mistake that became blunder of her life, the gravest mistake in her family’s eyes.

She fell in love and that was something she could never undo. She still got butterflies and knots in her stomach when he lovingly caressed her and he even, today took her breath away. Sameer was a normal boy of medium height and good looks but for Maya he was the most handsome boy in the world (apart from Salman Khan). They shared a strange relationship today; he abused her verbally and she criticized him yet she couldn’t dream of living without him. He’d quarrel with her and she would promise never to see his face again but the next morning the first thing she’d do was to text him or just simply call him. She worried incessantly about him, his careless attitude towards his life.

Love is a beautiful yet the most dangerous and poignant thing on this earth. One begins this magical journey with enchanting, ecstatic, and lovely thoughts but then life and with it, love never comes so easy; dreams shatter, thoughts break and love, the magic turns out to be sheer illusion. Lately Sameer had been acting really strange and kind of aloof, it seemed as though he was preoccupied with something.

Sameer had got his first job with the Tata Consultancy right after he finished his MBA but it wasn’t the hectic job that preoccupied him. His attitude was distant and it was hurting Maya. The world that she had been living, the dreams she had been weaving, the trust she had been building, all seemed illusionary… now the anguish appeared real and memories stung, mocking her. L

Maya sat in her room, in an emptying loneliness, silence towering around her, deep in her thoughts. She had her phone in her hand, she had just spoken to Sameer, and the words spoken over the phone were still revolving inside her head, causing hot tears tickle down her cheeks. She recalled what was said over the phone, took a deep breath, and dialed her best friend’s number. Three rings down and her friend picked up the phone;

“Yea, what’s up? Guess what happened,”

babbled on her friend but stopped herself as a sob broke from the other end. Silence. Sobs cracking up from the other end.

“Maya, what’s wrong honey?”

No answer. Sobs. After long fifteen minutes, the sobs subsided and Maya finally spoke,

“He called me up to tell me that he’s going away, he doesn’t want to keep any contact, and he thinks he’s not worth me. It’s all over. It’s all over.”

Sad, deep sigh!

“Look Maya, I think this is for the good of both of you. You guys need this separation so you can put your heads and hearts together and know what you both want from each other.”

Tears streaming down Maya refused to acknowledge that he really was gone.

“How can I live without him, without talking to him? He has become my habit. How can I kill my habit just like that?”

she posed these innocents questions at her friend not knowing that Time was going to change and then heal everything. She knew something horrible was coming up in her relation, her intuition was building all those months they fought, and he had seemed so distant yet she never wanted to believe that he would end their relation after all those eight sturdy long years.

Putting the phone down, she cried herself to sleep, her wrecking cries her lullaby that tried comforting her. Love was a strange thing, it had created magical spell around her and it stirred emotions in her that she never knew existed. It dared her to do such things that she dared not do before. Love had taken hold of her but the same love was changing her life again, destroying the very meaning, it had given her, marring her soul. She sat alone, loneliness her company and support.

She sat staring at her hands, trying hard to be strong, the hot hears rose in her deep eyes but she gushed them back with a sad but determined sigh. The magic within and around her had disappeared and her life had blurred out from the spells of enchantment. She now saw days as days without the magic of sunshine lifting her spirits and nights as dark and long without the enchanting spell of moon and stars that made her soar high up to them in the world of beauty, joy and dream! Nothing remained now except a bitter reality and an enveloping sense of loneliness. She didn’t know what to do except wait and hope that he would change his mind and come running to her.

Days passed by but there was no news of his. She had tried calling him but he had destroyed the number as well. He left leaving behind nothing of his existence, as if he were just a memory. Every day she struggle with unanswered questions. The struggle within her tore her self, breaking her heart and shattering all those beautiful dreams, she had decorated her life with. Her parents noticed the sudden change in her, they couldn’t bear their only child withering away in such an unknown pain that her hollow eyes and smile-less eyes reflected. The laughter died on her lips and the cheer spun out of her life. Her parents couldn’t understand and never knew what was eating their daughter for she could never divulge it to them. She had to fight alone the stalking demons of her life.

With the passage of time, she got used to the fact that he was gone but she had her hope alive that he would come back, one day. She was always lost in his memories, writing to him a letter each day, in her memory. Some days she wrote something in diary that inched her to move ahead. Today she had written on her diary.

“You are far, far away, in a cold place, maybe but my heart has preserved you in warm memories. I hold out my arms, can’t find you but when I hug myself, I feel you within me, comforting and warming me. You have the best piece of me with you and I know you will keep it safe till we meet again.”

This was her undying hope and untiring faith in her love. She knew her day would come when everything would be fine, happy and she had her faith in God that He would guide her and create a path for them she always prayed for him and his safe return to her.

She moved with the tides of her life; finding her solace in her parents’ love and laughter in her friend’s company. Her friend supported her but discouraged her from hoping for his return and Maya smiled at her friend’s naïve disdain, but her friend never really got well with the love of her life.

Six full months had passed since he had called her. The memories, always too painful, came back to sting. There was never a moment in a day when she didn’t remember him. It was if she breathed him. Never did he die out from her thoughts even though it was hurting her, scarring her heart! But did she care about herself, she never did!

Sweeping with time, she moved on with his memories kept safe in her heart. She often came to the very place they used to come to share some quality time being with each other years before, those years now seemed ages back. It was a cliff where the sky and water merged giving both of them a hope that they would unite in future against all odds. The cliff spread out towards the large water body, giving the place a dangerous yet exotic bearing. One could look out at everything yet nothing from this edge. After they got into relation, they always came to this spot that became a trademark of their love.

Sitting on the edge of that same cliff, she looked out at the splashing waves rocking against the stony precipice. She felt her life so meaningless, the self so bruised, the mind so numb and heart so devoid of memories. She felt as though she was in an impasse…. nothing moving, nothing changing. A moment juxtapose of tumult and tranquility. She hope that uncertain hope that he would come back bringing back sunshine in her life: he had to come back! The promises he had made could not be false, he could not have forged his love for her. Her eyes reflected the trauma, pain, the grief, and the anguish she was going through.

The sweet love story had sadly come to a despicable end, the end she didn’t want to believe. The eight years flashed before her; togetherness, declarations of love, the promises, the walking together in rain, just everything and denial that everything isn’t over made her life a living hell. She did not want to believe in the futility of her love. Her friends had tried hard to get her out of this ordeal but it was as thought pain was constant reminder of him, and that she wasn’t ready to let go. It was so sad: somewhere a heart beats, somewhere dreams shatter, somewhere trust falters, somewhere a lone tears rolls out, somewhere some memories meander away, and somewhere someone ends it all…it was seriously so sad!

One long year had rolled on from the day he had ended their relation. Maya was not the same; she didn’t want to remain the same. She finished her post graduation and now she wanted to leave this place as soon as possible. Everything and every place here reminded her of him. The memories always came back to bruise her and invoke her suffering. Her eyes had turned barren, mind devoid of happiness and heart cold stone…

She felt no pain now, she had numbed it, no despair lurked her being, all she sensed waves of bitterness rocking the depth of her being… She looked odd as if her soul had soul had given her up and she was left with flesh and bones. The mysticism of the world had died. She often walked down the memory lane trying to pick pieces of herself and trying to unravel what had gone wrong! Love felt falling down… in the end she was left hurt, scarred and with a memory of it forever.

“My heart was taken by you… broken by you… and now it’s in pieces because of you,”

she often shouted at the empty room with closing walls! He had lifted her high in the sky with his admissions of profuse love and he had crumbled her to ground. It wasn’t fair, not at all! She had stopped listening to music, with every song there was his memory attached. He had broken her Self, she had stopped blaming him months back, and she felt she was herself responsible for this misery and sad plight of their torn relation. She still hoped he’d come back. Her phone never rang back with his number and stupid she, kept calling on his number, which did not even exist!

She didn’t talk about him with her friends but when she did, she always said the same thing,

“when I close my eyes, I see him so close to me, that crooked smile on his face that I have always so loved and he looks at me fondly with those deep eyes that I find myself drowning in. He seems everywhere around me yet sadly he’s nowhere.”

She often wished there were no goodbyes! Every word, whether it was a remark, praise, a taunt, a tease, or even a rebuff that had ever been spoken to her by Sameer washed her over and over again. She realized whatever he had been and whatever he had done, he was the best thing that had ever happened to her. She had no information about him, nothing at all!

Time, they say is the best healer yet it had not completely healed her. There were scars on her soul, bruises on her heart, her trust in every feeling had been mutilated and she was a wounded being trying to move ahead in life that gave her no other option. She was soon leaving her home for her further studies. She had got her admission for her PhD and getting her doctorate was the goal that pushed her forward. She had lots on her mind with just few days for her to leave yet nothing stopped her from thinking about Sameer. It was as if the thinking spells of Sameer kept her alive in her life.

Few days before she was to leave, she went for shopping. She was busy shopping when she saw him. She first thought she was dreaming but it was Sameer in person. Her memory had kept his features safe in her mind and she couldn’t fail to recognize him no matter how much he could alter. Her reflux feeling was telling her to run to him and beseech him to take her back but her self-respect prohibited her to do that. Instead, she looked away; and looking away was just so plain hard when she wanted to breathe in him and his every move.

Tears slowly lurked out, damn them! they too betrayed her. She didn’t know how to compose herself in this painful situation. She picked up her things, paid for them at the counter and walked out of the shop as quickly and as gracefully as she could. Her heart was beating so fast that she felt people beside her would hear it and damn the tears, they were rolling down rapidly yet softly.

She was moving away when she heard his voice behind her; the voice she ached to hear, the voice that had given her nightmares, the voice that had broken her heart beyond repair and the voice that had made her fall in love irrevocably! He was calling her name slowly and gently. She didn’t know if she should turn back and fall in his arms or just walk ahead.

He had reached her, she could hear and smell him, and before she could make up her mind, he had turned her to him. There was he, his smoldering eyes with regret, she sensed. He wasn’t smiling her favorite crooked smile but was just staring at her and she was drinking him with her eyes after one whole year. She couldn’t get enough and she felt her world stop right before him. There was nothing she wanted so badly in life yet something she was so scared to have.

“O God, how could something so beautiful and effortless that they had between them could end on such an embittered note,” she pondered.

“Maya, Umm…I…ummm…I don’t know what to say but I am sorry. I tried getting back to you but I just didn’t have the courage to face you.”

Ah! after hurting and bruising her and yes breaking her trust even in herself, he had something fine to say- sorry! She wanted to reprimand and slap him and even hug him tight and take him back- every fiber of her body wanted to take him back but she just didn’t do any of that but just gave him a very sad look and walked away; away from him before the composure would break. Something strange was happening to her and something was guiding her.

All that year she had wanted him back and today when he was just inches away from her, she had given him away- how and why, it was something she herself could not fathom. She just knew she had to walk away from him, maybe because she wanted him to feel the intensity of the suffering that she had felt or maybe she wanted him to fully realize that he wanted both of them together again or maybe the bond for him had snapped away in the painful hurt.

Sameer looked at her confusedly but slowly the truth of her anguish, hurt dawned on him, and he comprehended the grave truth that he had betrayed her deeply and to have her back, he had to give the test for his love, loyalty, and dedication. He had himself thrown them back in a spur of moment. He had his regrets but he was himself responsible. He looked at her with an absolute purpose of winning his ladylove again with new intense faith and dedication. He knew it wouldn’t be easy but he just knew he had to do it. It began to drizzle and both of them walked in opposite directions with a hope that someday they would walk together towards same direction in the rain!!

Javeria Khurshid

javzsyed@yahoo.com