It was yet another one of those nights. She could not sleep, however hard she tried. Not a new thing, it was much experienced and dreaded.
Outside the cicadas were chirping gleefully. The thunder had passed and the silver moonlight gleamed in through the window, alighting everything in her messy room.
“No! Not anymore!” She groaned softly, hugging herself with her head bent. A soft moan escaped her combined with the filling of her eyes. Sick of everything, she jumped up from her bed, wiped the tears away furiously and went to stare at the mango tree just outside her bedroom window. Moonlight shone on her face and her sad eyes gleamed in response.
“I love you.” She said softly,as if to no one in particular.”I always have..from the minute i laid eyes on you..” …she whispered with conviction…”but I am confused”.
The cicadas were listening in silence. The moon stopped his celestial journey and did not move lest her face was left in darkness. The mango tree gently silenced his swaying leaves.
“I love you”..she repeated..with more vigor…sure of herself and her feelings. Her eyes filled again. This time,she did not brush the hot tears away. She wept in agony and her sobs cut through the silent room like shattering glass, sharp and precise.
The air swept around her in a swift motion and memories encircled her.
He was nothing like the man of her dreams. But he captured her heart,tenderly and confidently,perhaps even in more strength than the man of her dreams would ever have done. A college senior, who had taken a liking to this frail girl with her captivating smile and charming chatter. At first he felt like an elder brother to her, and dissuaded the others from taunting her and always listened to her, be it her sorrows, complaints, silly banters or her fanciful stories; the fanciful stories, which earned her an affectionate place in his heart. As time flew by..together, they smiled,held their hands and walked towards that ocean called love. That vast,pleasant yet traumatic,captivating yet painful, ocean.
The Magical,Mystical and Mysterious ocean.
The selfsame ocean in which only a blessed few are fated to cross …and the rest are fated to drown.Into the deep darkness,where agony engulfs.
Her fate was to drown. And drown she did.
A little after exchanging her heart, she felt a sense of despair eating her. It ate her peace, her mind,and eventually her soul. What was that pain?Why was she agonized by it? She never knew. All she knew was that she loved him. Slowly her world revolved past her,with little or no notice given to it by her.It was only him that mattered. His happiness,his sorrows,his mood. She lost herself.
Quiet and withdrawn, she gazed painfully at all those people who were her friends, to whom she could not talk any more. She lost track of everything. Time flew by. It never stopped.And she never got a chance to discover herself or to pick up the fallen pieces.
And he was sad too.Where did that bubbly girl go to? How was she replaced by this sad girl whose eyes were fated to be sorrowful always? He still loved her with the same passion. He never questioned fate.Only cursed her pain.
The tornado of memories vanished. She came back to reality. Hard and cruel reality that she was fated for.
Wiping her eyes,she went back to bed. Sleep she must,lest she could not wake up for college in time.The moon slowly drifted by and the cicadas started chirping afresh and the night slowly died out.
The Sun bathed her room with his golden rays. Another morning was here.
Her cellphone beeped loudly. Still rubbing her eyes, she stretched her hands to pick her cell from the table next to her bed and read the message.
“Gudmorning anu..! :) :*** Had a nice sleep dear? ” from Nithin at 7:25 am.
Quickly rubbing her eyes,she replied,with that sweet possessive smile on her lips. That smile she always carried on her lips when she read his texts.
“Morning dearest! Oh yeaa I slept like a cat…dint know a thing at all!” :) :) :D ;)
Covering her text message with a lot of fake smiley symbols that did not quite match her mood,she replied to his message and dragged herself from underneath the blankets, to face yet another page in the book of her life .