LLC03: THE INTERMISSION

The Intermission is a Love letter written in the form of a short story and is dedicated to the Song of Life sung by many a people but tuned by a few. Age and time are the best teachers who teach the lessons of life and set the music of souls to rhyme with living. In this attempt there are many who perish but a few diligent lives create harmony and peace to their lives and further to the lives of the souls connected to them. Some say that Living is difficult but living a harmonious life is simple. This story is an attempt to help those distorted souls who have undergone pain and inexplicable agony to set things right. May this attempt and the attempts of many other fellow writers help to establish and strike the right chord to maintain peace and mutual respect between two beautiful creations of GOD – MAN AND WOMAN……..

Sarhari (author)

Shadows Shadows everywhere, Shadows Shadows all there,

Shadows Shadows no where, Shadows Shadows now here,

Shadows of the Self and the Selfless surmount there,

Shadows of the Soul and the Sole paramount here……….

 

Dear Nikki ! We are just done with the guests who had gathered at our farmhouse for your little daughter Trusha’s engagement. The would be in-laws had consulted both the astrologer and me to fix the wedding date and it is fixed for the 20th of next month. How I wish you were here to bless Trusha and admire the transition of your small girl into a responsible woman. Everybody kept admiring the pair and I had your presence in my tears of joy. Love you Nikki. Please come back and break your vow.

It was our 25th wedding anniversary and there was an atmosphere of amusement everywhere. Little Trusha was fluttering round the bungalow with her friends with a secret of her father concealed restlessly in her heart that he was going to offer a surprise gift to her mother, that is you. But then …………..the hell broke loose and in no time the palace of my dreams dropped as a rubble of silent screams.

The woman, Mrs.Bhanu, entered our celebration and you believed her story that I was flirting seriously with her sister, who was my assistant in the office, and was also running a parallel home with her. You believed that gossip monger but I could not see even a small sign of trust in your eyes for me. 25 YEARS……25 LONG YEARS and not a sign of TRUST!!!!!!! You killed me that day and you sealed our togetherness by severing all human ties that we call FAMILY.

The day you entered Babaji’s Ashram, I entered the life of little Trusha as a father ,a mother and a friend as well. For many years she kept asking me about your whereabouts but I remained speechless as I felt that my silence, at certain instances ,was very much required for the healthy mental development of my only child. I kept cursing you all these years and silently accused you for having failed as a mother. I was not ready to realize that a mother is also a woman because like any other man , my wife as a mother was more acceptable to me than a woman as a wife.

Slowly an inexplicable feeling has started creeping in my mind. In my moments of sudden outbursts against you, I have started knowing you…………………………… better…..

I did not know how and from where to execute the remaining channels of my life. I took a short break from the office and went for a small holiday to Goa. Trusha lost herself, in the beautiful scenario engulfing the exotic Goa,in one of the beaches and I was lost in your hateful memory. I felt cheated by you and blamed you wholeheartedly for putting my peaceful truthful life into a turmoil. I hated you every moment and cursed that moment when I had rejected all the proposals brought by my parents and chose you as a LIFE-PARTNER but you had cut my life into parts.

Suddenly my thoughts were interrupted by the call of a man standing beside me. I stood up and tried to recognize him. He was an elderly gentleman wearing dark glasses. I showed a sign of ignorance by non-confirming his identity and he removed the glasses. I had never seen him before yet he looked too familiar. Without any further ado, we walked along the waves as little Trusha played on.

He told me that he was a writer who loved to travel to unknown destinations in search of suitable events for his stories. He was all alone in this world with only a few friends and plenty of books which he called his treasure. As he talked to me, he kept gazing at the beach babes and smiled at a few of them. I remembered how you had left an office party in haste just because a beautiful girl kept conversing with me for a long time.

I sometimes wonder that we all claim to be educated and knowledgeable but how often we miserably fail when another person’s attitude challenges our knowledge and reasoning. Life becomes a Page 3 character where we promise to make headlines.

My musings were again interrupted by my just- made friend . He desired to satisfy his taste buds with sizzlers and I joined him. Trusha was enjoying the waves , playing with some children . Her world was so beautiful where there was no room for ego clashes and she thoroughly enjoyed that state where children often wonder at the behaviour of elders and provide innocent solutions to make matters simple without realising that no elder has ever relied on a child’s solution.
Mr. Sebastian, my friend at the beach, finished his sizzlers and took leave of me to retire to his shack near the beach. We too left as we had to drive down early morning ,with our holidays coming to an end that night. Trusha was very happy and I was calm.

That night I heard a knock at my guest house . It was Mr. Sebastian. Rubbing my eyes which had woken from a fast sleep, I enquired about his arrival. He sat on the chair and took out a photo from his wallet and showed me. It was the photo of a young woman, probably in her 20s. I smiled naughtily at him and wanted to know who she was.

He said, “Well!!!! That’s my wife who died two years after our wedding and her charm never allowed me to marry again. I love her and will keep doing so. Actually I forgot to introduce her to you at the beach and so I brought her to you so that you too can meet my LIFE -PARTNER.”

Saying this , he left hurriedly , leaving me almost in a state of shock and musing at the word LIFE-PARTNER!!!!!!!!!!!

 When the lamp is shattered , The light in the dust lies dead

When the cloud is scattered , The rainbow’s glory is shed.

 When the lute is broken, Sweet tones are remembered not.

When the lips have spoken, Loved accents are soon forgot.

                                                                                                                                    – SHELLEY

 For my glad heart is drunk and drenched with Thee,

 O inmost wind of living ecstasy!

O intimate essence of eternity!

                                                                                                                               – Sarojini Naidu

A sort of calmness suddenly flocked me and while driving back home , the next morning, I had decided to forgive you. The blame game had ended our happiness and I was now waking up to a new dawn . Trusha was constantly gazing at me with a confused look as she had never seen her father so very content in life. I realised how much I loved you but never honoured your presence in my life. My family life was so simple but it was I who had made it so very complicated.

A new awareness seemed to dawn on me . I had such a lovely wife and a child then what drove me closer to that secretary in the office and I flirted with her!!!!! Can she replace you or your responsibilities as a wife and as a mother? All of a sudden her image filled me with remorseful anguish. At that moment I was changed. Mr. Sebastian had changed me………..FOREVER……

A cool flow of breeze passed my face and I woke up with the deep impact of the chillness that had engulfed my bedroom through the open window. Where was the car? Goa? Trusha? And above all Mr. Sebastian????????????? I found Trusha sleeping beside me like an angel that had just completed her journey round the globe and was now resting in the arms of Sleep. Was it all a dream – was there no Sebastian? Yes. It was my subconscious forming images and solutions to control my life as I slept after a heavy workout at gym.

It was a strange dream and it took me almost an hour to realize that it was indeed a dream that had now brought contentment to my evergrowing disturbances in life. Dear Nikki! I also learnt from some sources near you at the ashram that you hardly talked to anybody there and were living a life of celibacy. You were helping people to help themselves which was a very noble deed and I am proud of you. Suddenly I feel that I am a dwarf in front of your magnificent personality and will continue to remain so.

This is my very first love-letter to you after our marriage and I never ever imagined that it would be written to you after we separate. I don’t have the courage to call you back as I remember my bickerings that I levied on you when you were leaving my home. The kind of life that you have adopted may not permit you to return back but Kindly remember that I am waiting for you with your daughter beside me.

Yes. One more thing. I have a very good news for you. That office assistant of mine who was responsible for our split is now married and well settled abroad. It was I who initiated her wedding to an NRI. She was just my friend and believe me I had no intimate relationship with her. I know that in my college days, I did charm girls and befriended them for a different reason but after our marriage, I knew the significance of our relationship and tried to maintain our bonding but notwithstanding that my past collided with my present and injured our future. I am sorry for being so helpless that I could not bring you back from where you had gone.

Trusha grew up in her aunt’s place but strictly under my supervision. She did her graduation and my boss Mr. Jayendra chose her for his son Adhiman who has recently completed his MBA . He has opened his own import/export textile business and our Trusha will join him as Managing Director after the marriage. Trusha has also confided to me that she will visit you in the ashram to seek your blessings along with Adhiman. If you permit, I too will join the couple and meet you.

Dear Nikki! My Love! I wish to meet you because your surprise gift which I wanted to give you on that 25th anniversary is waiting to embrace you. You will be surprised at my surprise but I don’t know how you will evaluate my gift of love.
Nearly 10 years have passed since you left us. Earlier you sent some letters to your daughter but for past 1 year , there is a complete draught of information from your side. I hope all is fine there and we will be able to hear from you soon.
Your ego-centric but ever loving husband, Kunal, is looking forward to meet you soon with Trusha and Adhiman.

                                                                          The life that I have , Is all that I have

And the life that I have Is yours

 The love that I have , Of the life that I have

 Is yours and yours and yours.

                                                                                                               – Leo Marks

 

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