I met a guy yall, a guy that is for me . Designed for me. It was written for me to end up with him and no one else. He is not just a guy or any guy for that fact, but a man. This man ummm. He has charm , he is smart and so handsome. When I see him he gives me chills. He is a God souled man who sinned all his life til now. Since he changed his life he now he wants a wife , a family , a future and with me and my child . I prayed for this man all my days.
Since I was 13 I wanted a man like this yet could never find him anywhere. Not at home, not at school, not at work, not on the block. No where. Till I got my divorce and gave my life to God and began going to church with my son faithfully every Sunday. I loved Sundays. Sundays I heard the word of God from a preacher that I swore spoke to me only.
He once said God blesses a woman who is scorned. The good Lord knows I have been scorned time and time again. I have been used , cheated on. I have been forced to be a prostitute, I have had men who slept with my friends, I have had men who will say they love me and hurt me with fists and words in the same minute. I have been called every name in the book by a man. Well I shouldn’t describe any of my ex’s as men they are nothing, but childish boys who God will deal with in his own way in his own time.
I wish no harm on anyone who did me wrong. The Lord knows my heart. Through my cries, my pain, my depression , my heartache, my sorrow, my lost, the backstabbing I endured. I never wish harm on these people. I know the best revenge is to live well. Though they may say this new God souled love may hurt me. Only God knows. I rather take my chances on a man of God then with a man of the devil.
It took many many years for me to realize it was time to walk out on my last so called love. The one who I thought was the one and whom I wanted to marry , have kids and spend the rest of my life with. I don’t question God. I know he puts people in our lives for a reason and many times I said why these ex’s came in my life and hurt me instead of some many others out there. I know that is not a way to think. Blessed indeed I am they did enter my world with out them I would never knew what real love feels like. A man can buy me things, cook for me and it means nothing if they can not treat a woman the way she wants to be treated.
This God souled handsome man calls me every day, texts me and asks how my day is going. He tells me Im gorgeous even though my past relationship broke me to the point I had no self esteem and made me feel I was nothing with out him. This new love is fresh and we can hold hands and walk together. He brags about me and dislike men who hit or hurt women. Don’t get me wrong we have plently of disagreements. There is also things about eachother we don’t like. When it comes to communication though we both talk in soft voices and listen to the other and wait til the other is finished to get our point across. We tell each other nicely what we need to work on and we compliment each other and encourage each other every day. The best part is he loves my son.
I am not at all in a rush for my son to call him dad. I am however in a rush to start my family with him. It feels as if I was missing him my whole life. I need this. I haven’t cried , no headaches, no stress, not worried about other women , and not worried about him putting his hands on me. I need this life of peace and content. My friends and family love him. My son loves him. All I needed was the strength to walk away from the past to gain the best future. I should have been left that old life. Sometimes things need time to fall into place and it finally falling into place for me.
I love my guys ..my son and my man my God souled man. It’s us forever . Praise the Lord and thank you Father God. Amen.