LLC01: Love Letter to Husband/ Wife
Creative Writing – Love Letter Contest 2013
© YourStoryClub.com
Dear Aaliyah,
I may have lost my conscience but I am not. I can’t see any thing around me as if they don’t exist. It appears that I am in the midst of the windows between the nights and the moon lights. These are not the premonitions but something that I witnessed in the past. Rings of fire and the shades of light is encroaching our lives and this is what it appears to me. I see a moment of bliss surrounding me. Something’s, had always ignited my heart. Maybe I am not blinded to see this.
But I can see you. You are smiling at candle light dinner on 14th Feb 2013 at the Lovy Birds Resort. You were holding your hands and trying out that childish stuff. Picking those broken seeds of rice beneath your finger nails. If the minds were not in peace, the nails come in service at your restlessness in breaking those broken boiled rice particles. I don’t have those nerves to say that the forks are big enough to break those tiny pieces. I am digesting my words to keep me safe. Better not bother an angry tigress or else she will peel off my entire skin. A moment of silence preludes on either side.
Few hours back I rejected your proposal for celebrating our 1st anniversary on 20th Feb at your Fathers place. I don’t hate that good man but it’s just the natural in me that I snored in anguish. I clearly said to you that I am okay with it but there is still some amount of disturbance in you. Now, they are clearly manifesting those signs. I can hear those annoying sounds. Tines of the fork are now beginning to scratch the plates, emanating sounds of cracking frequencies. My nerves have already begun to shiver my legs and my thorax. The tine makes an exact circling for about half a minute and suddenly they raise in abrupt. How would I know about those impishness behaviors your grandma use to tell me, unless I see them? A moment of silence preludes thereafter, lending for premonitions for your next moves. Sometimes you enjoy staring at three-tined fork with those big kitty eyes, pretending to threaten me. I don’t think I have seen it but in a blink of an eye, the fork has just reached a fork’s distance for my skin.
Besides, love is in air. Glittering Amethyst in your neck, those shining brilliant in the candle lights are just luring me. It is a big precious stone with many faces reflecting lights in all directions. It shines more when you wore it. And, I am very glad to see that you wore it for the day besides those disturbances. I can’t just turn my face aside. Best things about Lovy Bird are the DJ’s and the Violinist who make the day more romantic. I gave those aquamarine earrings to make you prettier. Moonstone was also prettier but you chose it for the day.
I have a small little world in me that thinks only simple. Complexities are never in my dictionary so I don’t have to deal with it until today. Things going around in my mind are about you and our complexities. I already knew that there doesn’t seem to be any improvement on the romantic side as long as the confrontation prevails. The plate is still full on my side but there is little on hers. Well, I thought that it’s the time to take my meal before things blow up. But the problem here is that the food won’t pass through my esophagus, unless she gets placid. What I need is serenity, a moment of calmness and a little smiley face on you. There is this one complete year containing 365 days, I had watched you since marriage. You may speak a little or may not but you will never smile for this day. I had been trying to tell her by my psychotic expressions, that today is valentine’s day and please don’t ruin it as it comes once in a year. But, I knew that she won’t change her brain.
I can see you, but I can’t let myself turn my head watching those couples at the other side. Those couples on the dice chose for western style, while some are looking great with that merengue dancing. I have already started to become envy of them. This is our 1st anniversary and she is not cared about it. What those nonagenarian couple doing there? It’s hard to say that they are old; they are just as good as young couples. I was just curious to know about that birthday cake lying on their table and what that old man is reading from his chit. I had almost been sneaking into other’s valentine day celebrations. Well, one thing is clear to me that love doesn’t age as long as we keep them alive. Probably I should be little more concerned about your considerations.
Things that bother me, is you. If you are happy then I am fine and this is what I can understand. This is what I just learned recently. Perhaps I may not have learned this thing if you were here.
I wake up in the morning by those crying crows in the backyard. It is all lifeless here. I hear only the sounds of non-living things. Few hours back I can still hear those vehicular sounds emanating from the ceiling fan. Window move to and fro but never stay idle. I make sure that I am happy without you, but it just aggravates my problem of solitary in this house.
I was just wondering to myself as if I am reciting this to you, because this is what I feel here. Maybe, I had lately developed these little maniacs in me. I make sure that I see your photograph when I open my eyes. No morning tea and no good morning words and no smile here. So, I stare you for a while to cope up with these joyful moments I used to enjoy. I fear to wake up daily to witness these things. There is no interest in bread, butter, jam and biscuits. Mostly, I go empty stomach in the mornings. No lunchbox and no goodbye. My hearts feels pounded every time I step outside of the door without seeing you.
My life at outside is all filled with envy. Right through the journey from home to the company I dare not to look anybody. The women at 2 houses apart send off her kids and her husband with smiling gestures. When, those friends of you pass by they ask about you for a get together. I wish that I don’t see them while on the move. Almost every day I had to cross that shop because it is the only way out to the highway. The shopkeeper lady asks about you, she says that she misses you very much. The problem starts when those couples pass by. I can’t miss to watching them. There was a time when I use to take you out on the scooty. I remembered that there was no time for worries and fears.
These days I reach the company well before the schedule. In fact, we are holding an industrial conference today where I had to give a talk in the morning session. So, I left a little earlier to make sure that the conference room is well organized. I was key person to look after this as my boss said. This is of great importance to the company as many big shot peoples are going to come. Everything well organized and it is good see all of my colleagues in time. I didn’t notice it until this time when something caught my attention. I already knew that I had lost my tone and started to get nervous. On my back is a big screen to display my slides and a small projector hanging from the ceiling. It shines brilliant colors on the screen. For the 10 slides I was on the other edge of the platform giving a good presentation using hand gestures.
I was describing the figures which detail the marketability of our products and how did we fared in the past. There were profits at some quarter and while we run at zero margin basis for the rest. Inspite of faring low for few recent months we are still able cope with the current markets and remain to provide better services to our customers. I was to introduce new market segments showed promising results we observed in the recently and may show to be highly profitable in future and this is where I need to play tactically to impress those big shot ones at the 1st row.
This is where I bow my head a little to see them in 1st row but then I was driven by it and stood clam for a moment. Yes, it was the rose on the podium and beautifully arranged. It is that rose which I had attached my sentiments with and those roses that are best in the city with seeds from exotic breeds. Those roses which began my most romantic life I ever had. Those roses I had used to propose you, I see them on the podium and I saw them as my weakness. It was the moment which changed my life when you accepted these roses and a moment I began my journey with you, which I can never forget.
I don’t know how got these roses arranged, but I stood there for a moment in silence. I had to say something to continue, but I don’t remember it so I used my gut feelings to go ahead with and said, “My dear friends, be it a moment of desperation or lose of hope but you still exist there. It’s doesn’t matter what is the current scenario, you have to do what is good for them and for the society. Not to remind you that life is actually a moment of happiness but then ups and down are also parts of this which can never be separated. We have seen many ups and down during our lives at here and we have learned many things from it. Be it success or failure we will never let ourselves bow down, we will struggle to achieve what we deserve and do the best what we can. It is up to the destiny what it decides for us. But, I am sure that whatever the repercussions are we will be always prepared to tackle that together. Thank you.”
I was just on my 10th slides and not even a half had been done I had to go with my gut feelings to impress them. It just came upon me so it just got winded up this way. To my surprise the big shot ones stood altogether and burst out in enthusiasm. I can hear the loud clapping sound right from the last row.
I got relieved to hear the claps and more than that I was happy to know that somehow the it went with ruining the conference. Still thinking about those roses and the smiles I saw in your face. On one side it a great happiness to renew the nostalgia in my heart but then my soul says that these may turn to be the faded days of my life.
I am writing to you to say how bad I miss you since you left me. I can’t say my true feelings to anyone else so I keep it to myself. They have piling up so much that I am feeling sickness of this congestion. Days go by, remaining in silence and in solitary. When matters get worse, I lay placid watching your photograph. It’s been just a week since you left me alone.
May be that old man has inspired me lot to chose for the poetry as the medium to express my feeling so I can share what exactly I mean to say from the bottom of my heart that how much I love you with my small poem that I been working on for the past many days. I don’t know why but I owe my happiness for that memorable valentines days. I am just learning to know how lucky I am, to have you.
When I see those earrings,
my heart goes sick.
When their lights shine on my eyes,
I go comatose.
Sinking deep into those oceanic eyes,
in search of pearls;
I lay wandering,
in those cosmic attractions.
Like shivering birds in the storm,
I am feeling the feverish.
Still, I see you like an Owl
in the glittering sky of the night.
Moon like face
and dumb like a Moon,
my eyes are illusioned
like those lunatic witches.
Nerves are paralyzed,
so lend me some more time,
I will see the eternity;
in paramnesia.
It’s this frenzy atmosphere,
when I see those earrings,
I don’t know why?
but something lures me.
I can’t just wait for our 2nd anniversary and for the present I had been working on to give it to you on the day.
With love,
Raaka
