A Window

“I want that bed next to window!” a dulcet voice bawled.

Harish woke up.

“Madam, that bed has already been occupied by someone. You will have to accommodate on this bed”, the ward boy made an effort to pacify her.

“You are asking me to adjust?” the sound was fuming, “where is my son? I would like to have a word with him. Get me a new room.”

“Madam, no private room is vacant at present. You will have to adjust in a semiprivate space and this is the best room free”, he was doing all he can to settle her down.

In a trice the door unbolted and a new voice popped up, “Mom…Mom…Mom…please calm down…your voice can be perceived out in the corridor.”

“So…what…I want that bed, Manish.”

“Mom! Don’t act like a child please…first you take deep breaths and give an ear to what I say… peacefully…this is the finest room that I chose for you and see to it that this bed will go well with you more…it’s nearer to the toilet. Please…try to co-operate Mom…”

“But…”

“Mom…this is a hospital. Please…put your anger aside and relax.”

She stared the ward boy like a kid whose favorite chocolate had been snatched and then had to manage with a small candy. She sat on the bed and inhaled deeply.

“Very well…all right…” Manish said, “you put your feet up…I had a word with doctor…tomorrow morning…at seven they are taking you for the biopsy.”

All through the hullabaloo and fussing, Harish almost boiled the ocean to have a brief look of the lady whose melodious voice he was hearing since few minutes. But the drapes isolating the room in two portions were providing an impediment. He shifted his headback and forth, up and down just to have a sight of the lady but all in vain. Unexpectedly but fortunately a current of air drew the curtains slightly apart for a second or two, enough for him to have a glimpse of her.

She must be in her late sixties but she was gorgeous. The allure and charisma on her face was exquisite. She looked elegant, audacious, confident, intelligent and learned. Her hairs were black, short up to her shoulders and well fastened into a ponytail. She appeared well maintained at her age. Her first look can let anyone contemplate what the lady was doing in the hospital. But ailments don’t see the personality.

Harish was occupied in her thoughts when the commotion finally settled down and his daughter turned up, “Dad…you want anything?”

Harish rolled his peeking eyes from curtain to his daughter, thought for a second and then moved his neck sideways in refusal. She subsequently took a seat by his side and he shifted his gaze out of the window. His daughter took an apple out of the plastic bag and went to wash it. Two minutes later when she was back she found him struggling to peep through the curtain yet again. She softly smiled and picked knife and plate from the stool and sliced the apple. Harish took a piece and once more tried to peer from the curtain to have a sneak look of the lady.

His daughter, Sneha, noticed him, “Dad…” and she grinned.

He saw into her eyes and then returned the smile.

She said in a soft voice, “Dad, you’ve got a new neighbor.”

He blushed and smiled with his craggy wrinkled face and full-fledged beard.

“Want to have a word with her?” she again whispered playfully.

He swayed his head in denial with a smile.

 

It was roughly six in the evening and the doctors were on rounds. The doctor for the lady got there first.

“Hello Mrs. Shalini…how do you feel?” he asked while examining her pulse.

She looked at him with half opened eyes, “I am not feeling better doctor.”

“Why? What are you feeling?” the doctor asked.

“Doctor…I want the bed close to window and…”

“Mom”, her son interjected.

She glared at him. He turned quiet. Doctor smiled, “Mrs. Shalini. We seek to provide you the best. However for now, the person on the other side might need that bed the most. So…you simply lighten up. It’s just a matter of few days and then you will be discharged.”

“And what if I die during the stay doctor?”

“You won’t die…believe me…”

She was quiet.

Doctor continued, “OK…see…you tell me did you have any kind of headache, nausea or vomiting in the past 24 hours?”

“Nothing doctor…”

“Then you need not to be anxious. You are absolutely okay. Take it easy and be calm”, doctor smiled and left.

As the door was shut, Shalini got to her feet. She could not wait any longer and with her small steps headed for Harish’s bed. Her son rose, “Mom where are you going?”

“Stay here Manish, let me speak to that person myself. Hospital won’t give me that bed but I will let him discern my condition. I know he will certainly understand.”

“Mom…why are you getting so stubborn? Please hold on …” but before he could finish his words, she already had reached the other side. He went after her to restrain his agitated mother.

Harish listened in everything. He was actually waiting for this moment. He craved to see her from tip to toe. She was truly pretty and attractive. She might be old but her charm was still young and fresh. She was beautiful as a rose and the whole ambiance overflowed with a sweet aroma of her. And Harish slowly felt inebriated.

“Excuse me!” she said, “Can you please move to that bed?”

Harish was completely mesmerized by her beauty. He was spellbound by her profound brown eyes. He was deaf to whatsoever she was speaking. He was simply feeling her.

Concluding there won’t be a response, she again said, “Excuse me Mr.! Can you please shift to the other bed?” she was losing her temper.

Even then he didn’t react and continued gazing at her unblemished beauty. She looked at Manish and then at Harish, “See…I am ill with a tumor in brain and tomorrow they will carry out the biopsy. So…before I hear the appalling news, I desire to witness the world out of this window…and that’s why if you don’t mind, can you please shift…”

“Excuse me?” a voice interrupted her. It was Sneha. Shalini and Manish turned to look at her and she resumed, “Something went amiss?”

“Beta…I want this bed but this man is not answering.”

“Sorry Aunty…I cannot shift my Dad to that side…he had the heart surgery last week and the machines that support him can be kept this side only…I am so sorry in this regard.”

Shalini was disheartened. Sneha added further, “and he didn’t reply for the reason that he cannot speak…an accident twenty five years back snatched his ability to speak…” and she choked.

“I am sorry”, Manish said, “Mom…let’s go…”

“I am sorry beta…I didn’t intend to…hurt you”, Shalini was shamefaced and embarrassed.

 

It was going on for midnight. Sneha was in a deep sleep. He got out of his bed and with a staggering gait somehow made to the other side. Manish was snoring and Shalini was not in her bed. ‘She must be in the toilet’, he thought and inaudibly left a letter, which he had written when Sneha was off to bring the medicine, on Shalini’s pillow and silently returned to his bed, lied and leisurely closed his eyes with a smile over lips.

Shalini when spotted the letter, was surprised that who could have kept it there. She read it.

 

Dear Shalu,

Can I still call you Shalu as I used to do all the time or should I call you Shalini now? It’s been almost forty years that we separated but today when I saw, just a glimpse of you was enough for me to make out my Shalu. You are still the same – beautiful, charming, attractive, pleasing, chirpy, adamant and pure at heart. You were always like this; if you want something, then you strive to get it. You leave no stone unturned.

Forty years back, when women were confined to domestic chores, you chose to move out and use your studies. You preferred your career over me but I never detested that. I was swollen with pride for my Shalu for the bold step that she took because I knew the path she was taking will prepare her for undesirable circumstances. I always wished that you get whatever you aspire in your life. I hoped success for you at all times. I wanted you to move ahead in life. I longed to be with you but you were familiar with my family. They wouldn’t have allowed me. They would have neither let you move out nor permit me to come with you. Consequently I decided to separate. I don’t know how you felt but it was truly challenging for me. I did it not for me but you Shalu… as I had loved you forever.

Prior to parting, you gave me our daughter and I understand it is dreadful for a mother to leave her child. I never let her abhor you. She loves you Shalu more than I love you. She waits for you. These forty years, she had anticipated her mother every moment to turn up exactly like I expected keenly for your replies to my letters. Yes Shalu…I wrote you every month for ten years but there was no response and then one day my letter came back to me stating nobody lives with this name at that address. I think you had changed your place. But were you so upset with me that you didn’t feel to reply nor inform me of your whereabouts?

Today you might have not identified me given that I have a full-grown beard and I have turned too aged to be recognized by you. You might have moved on in your life. You have a son. I think you have a happy family.

After forty years, I just want to say that let’s not recall the whole thing. Let’s not discuss who did the fault forty years ago, rather, if I still have the right, hug each other, cling our hands and breathe our last together as we had promised in our marriage.

Shalu, I had always been the same Hari and even now I am the same man that you married. I am that Hari who loved you and cared for you so much that he survived forty years alone with your magnificent remembrances.

Waiting for you Shalu to come up to the other side of curtain.

 

Forever Yours,

Harish…

 

Shalini could not prevent her tears rolling down the cheek. It was tough for her to believe that the person whom she was demanding to move to another bed is her husband, her Harish. She could not sleep the entire hours of darkness. She rolled to right facing the curtain and went on staring the drapes. She was restive. She wanted to go to the other part in a split of second but was finding it difficult to confront him.

It was five in the morning when Manish went out to catch the fresh air and Sneha too had moved out for morning tea, Shalini went the opposite side. Harish was sleeping.

“Hari…” she said with a heavy voice.

He opened his eyes a liitle and smiled faintly while directing her to lie next to him. She abides by his directions, stretched out alongside him and clasped their hands. They were quiet for a minute and felt the feeling of being together after forty years.

“Hari…” she stared at the roof, “I waited for you all these forty years. I replied to each one of your letter. I did write you of our son’s birth however you didn’t show up. I did tell you regarding my new address but then I never received any of your letters. I concluded that you are disappointed with me and hence I too stopped writing to you. Your letters made me suspect if mine were delivered to you but right now I am sure you received none of them. I don’t know who did it or what all went wrong but I knew one thing Hari…all these forty years, every day I believed you would come to meet us some day…”

She looked at him and then resumed, “Yes Hari…Manish is our son…we had waited for you at all times…I had forever loved you and treasured you…I missed you so much Hari…why I couldn’t be with you when you required me the most…” she was crying.

Harish placed his finger on her lips, wiped her tears and showed her the rising sun from the window. A dim smile widened her lips. He said what he wanted to with that first ray of light and embraced her. There was equanimity in the room. They both shut their eyes. Their hearts were close by and they could sense each other’s breath. The first rays of sun shone on their faces and they took deep breaths and fulfilled their promise.

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