Closure

The café was empty and silent except the television buzzing in one corner, just like Ajay’s brain. As he looked into her eyes, he couldn’t think straight. Maybe it was just a bad dream and he’d still wake up to their picture by his bedside. He looked away and back again and she was still there, it was no dream.

“Ajay please don’t make it more difficult than it already is,” she whispered.

Ajay found his voice and in a last ditch attempt said, “But why Vasu?! Why do you want to walk away just when everything is going right? It’s only about a year, once am done with my MBA, I can build for you the life you have always yearned for.”

Vasudha gave a nervous shout and then lowered her voice again, “Ajay it’s over and I have given you my reasons, please don’t push it any further. Let it be!” As she walked away, he slumped in the couch, a tear fell down his cheek, and he resigned to his fate. The café guy smirked, the one millionth break-up he had witnessed.

Vasudha gasped in relief; it had been easier than she thought it would be. Seven years was a long time and Ajay must have been hurt. But she had been left with no choices and it was in their best interest. Her marriage had been arranged with the US returned Rahul; he was everything her parents had wanted. Brilliant, ambitious, rich and very well educated. And of course who couldn’t want to marry her, she was gorgeous, fair, tall and a graduate from the city’s best college. A match made in heaven.

——

Their’s was the wedding of the season; people spoke about it for years to come. Her father was a top-shot bureaucrat and her wedding had been attended by the who’s who of Delhi. Vasudha & Rahul looked perfect, made for each other. Vasudha smiled, “Not so bad after all, this is what fairy tale marriages are made of,” she thought.

—–

The house was empty when Vasudha woke up, the kids had gone to school and Rahul wasn’t in town. She gulped down her coffee as she stopped to check herself out in her dressing room, she was no longer her slim self, and 3 kids had given her bulges at the wrong places. But she still looked like a diva!

“3 kids,” Vasudha sighed. The eternal Indian quest for a son had made them try again and again. Thankfully, the third one was a boy to take the family name forward. As she closed her jewelry box in her dressing room her eyes rested on the bracelet made of shells…her hand lingered on it for a while and her thoughts went back to Ajay…a very frequent occurrence these days. She snapped herself back to reality and went on with her boring day, like all other days. The kids were in school and wouldn’t be back till late and even when they got back they were closer to the nannies than her. Rahul was in yet another business meeting in Chicago. Anyways, he never had time for her. A hot-shot banker he was perpetually travelling.

The marriage had been loveless from day one, a marriage of convenience; the only love she ever got was in form of credit cards. For Rahul nothing mattered except work, constant travel, business deals, new assignments, board meetings, promotions and being on a fast track. Rahul was obsessed with work and making money. He was attending meetings even through their honey-moon! Even when the kids came he hadn’t been there.

Vasudha snapped herself out of her self-pity mode and thought, “Well, there are the kitty parties of course to keep me busy, spa sessions, retail therapy, card sessions, gym jaunts and some ten credit cards.” As she tapped her feet impatiently  the phone rang, it was Hema her oldest friend.

“Vasu you are coming right? For the alumni meet?” Hema quipped.

“Uh,” Vasu hesitated.

Hema pestered, “Oh C’mon! It’s been a long time since we met, let’s catch up. “And,” Hema stopped a bit…”Well Ajay is in town too.”

Vasudha’s face lit up. She was scared Hema would hear the incessant beating of her heart, somehow she controlled the quiver in her voice and said, “Hema, c’mon, Ajay and me are history. But anyways I will be there.”

Vasudha knew she had to look her best. Ajay, her very own Ajay, after 10 long years…she couldn’t stop smiling.

——

Vasudha was overdressed and she knew it. But that was the idea; her sources had told her that Ajay was married to a very simple girl. She had to glitter; she had to shine so that Ajay would remember them.

“Oh, how foolish I had been to let him go!”

Before she entered the ball room, she sneaked a glance at her reflection, perfect! She scanned the crowd and saw him. Suddenly everything else ceased to exist. There was Ajay, looking better than she remembered him. His hair was now a delicious mix of salt and pepper. As she walked towards him the crowds disappeared, the years vanished and suddenly there she was before him.

“Hi Vasu,” said Ajay in his baritone voice.

“Hi Ajay,” said Vasudha a little breathless. “How have you been?”

“Am good, Vasu. Meet my wife, Anuradha.”

Vasudha stiffened and said, “Hi Anuradha, how are you.”

“Anu, I and Vasu were in school together and then we lost touch when I was about to join MBA,” said Ajay dismissively.

Anuradha smiled, Vasu sized her up. Her casual jeans and shirt seemed to mock Vasu’s flowing satin gown, it angered Vasudha, she felt Anuradha was mocking her. Someone called for Anu, and it was her and Ajay again. Vasu was seething in anger, she put on her well-practiced haughty look, and topped it with her weapon of affluence, “So Ajay, what are you doing these days, still taking care of your dad’s grocery store.”

Ajay smiled, “You haven’t changed Vasu have you. Still running after glamour & money; well yes Vasu, dad still runs his grocery store, and I try and help him as much as I can.”

Vasudha was squirming by now as Ajay continued, “We, that’s me and Anu, we run a travel firm especially for adventure & wild life enthusiasts. Anyways, forget about me, how have you been?”

Vasudha’s head was buzzing, as if Ajay had slapped her, what should she say? That she was a bored trophy wife who had lost shine for her whiz-kid, materialistic husband. That she had given birth to 3 kids in her quest for a male heir. That there were nights when she could smell feminine perfume emanating from her husband’s clothes. That one evening she had seen her husband walk towards a hotel lift with another woman, hand in hand. Vasudha smiled, gathered herself and nodded, “Am good Ajay, very happy, I will see you around.” She quickly turned around and left.

And as she raced towards the exit their last conversation came gushing back to her, “Ajay, it will not work out for us. You will never be able to give me what I am used to. Am used to luxuries and comforts, shopping abroad, foreign trips. I can’t lead a simple life like yours. ”

Ajay had stopped her, tried convincing her, “In a year I will earn well enough. Give me a chance, give us a chance, we will build our lives together Vasu. Please,” he had begged.

But she had made her choice, of marrying a man with power, money, ambition and wealth. And with those choices, she had left behind the right to be loved. As she glanced back she saw them together, Anuradha threw her head back at a joke and Ajay put his hand lovingly around her back. This is what fairy tales are made of thought Vasudha as she returned to her life of boredom and infidelity.

__END__