It was hard to swallow, to breath, I was suffocating , she looked in to my eyes ,hopeless, it’s messages pierced through the barriers my throbbing soul ,it was as if I could almost hear her begging,
‘please, don’t do it, please!!’ every droplet of ticking time seemed more painful, “the boy…him too?”
“yes ,him too”, from beneath the fortress of the mother’s comforting arm, a young turned to me, he seemed to not understand what was happening, playing with his mothers eyes.
“It was cold to do that, no I can’t think link this I’ll have to do this”,I quickly brushed aside the taught of ever not doing what he wanted, turning to me he said
“look,I don’t have all day here, you wanted us here and like it’s going to turn into our death trap, now do it! ,your dragging this out for too long now”. I couldn’t help it but to stare in the eyes of sorrow, the whole world seem to no matter to her, for she was about to loose it all.
Stroking my head, tapping my beard, all the voices spoke at once, “yes do it” , “no don’t”. He was getting impatient scanning the area he looked as if he was going to get it over with,
“no jimmy, I’m going to do it but wait,” ,
he came charging towards me, grabbing me he barked “we don’t have much time left”,
shoving me forward, I started walking towards the woman, for once she ignored me, hugging the child, placing my hand in the back pocket, the cold metal soon touched human desire and determination, it seemed heavier than normal , I guess having it and using it can some times be different.
“no, no pleases don’t’ as I drew nearer she kicked up a soft voice ,pebbles pitching towards me,
“listen, this is what that needs to be done”, I violently grabbed the child by his arm, pulling him away from her, she rushed towards me, duty was duty and I hand made up my mind, timmy held her back.
A cold wind kicked in, the child started crying, the silver revolver shun brightly , “so heavy’ I taught to myself, stretching my hand out to the woman ,i said
“look here,….thiss is yours……take it”
she snatched it from me , looking around nervously, suddenly she jumped forward ,grabbing the child, “wait, I want to say good bye….son be a good child, god bless you,’
wiping the kiss off of his face she released him, I quickly spun around and ran off, timmy soon joined me, between the click-clack of my foot steeps, timmy whispered, “aren’t you going to say good bye’,I pretended as if I didn’t hear him.
Running down the stairs the old train kicked up it’s noisy engine hum, and we were going to miss it, bursting through the door the old red was trotting off ‘hhuryy timmy!!!’ he quickly ran passed me ,jumped onto one of the carriages ,he grabbed me, pulling me on the carriage, I sat in corner among some hay ,he was still crying, I looked in the face of my younger reflection, “don’t worry son, daddy is here” .Timmy turned to me laughing ,he said, “soldier!!! Don’t pet the young marine’.
__END__