The Four of Me

“Shadows known before, feel heavy, harder to see. An apt Kill.

They believe what’s not real, I only see the Thrill.

What used to be real, what used to be…?”

Ashley felt a rush of tranquility run through her as she hummed the lines. She was at peace. It wouldn’t last long, but until it did she felt in control. As she walked back, tired yet content, a sense of calmness engulfed her. She owed it to herself, after all that she had been through. She felt complete. Confident. Unlike you. You could never defend yourself.

******

Iraa had abruptly left her workplace, scared and confused. She had stormed into Stephen’s cabin and asked for the rest of the day off.

“I’m fine Steve, nothing serious. Something’s come up. I’ll do some extra hours this week to fill in”.

She hadn’t spoken to anybody else. She saw Richard at a distance. Could it be him?

Iraa’s workplace was the sixth floor office of an advertising company in a plush sixteen story building at Colaba. The place was cool and informal, and Stephen was an easy boss to work with.

******

Joseph Maria was studying the contents of the Ryan’s personal diary that the police had managed to procure. The tall and heavy frame of his cut an intimidating figure. Maria had recently been promoted to senior inspector. With his impeccable track record and experience, it was only imminent.

The morning had been positive. The tiny brown diary bore enormous credence. A day to day record of the 23 year old Masters student, who was brutally murdered the night before at his apartment in Bandra, would make the case easier. The diary had given them a few leads. The most significant one was that of a young woman named Sara, whom Ryan had been seeing recently. Ryan described her as an attractive looking girl with an impeccable dressing sense. He wrote about how he was completely smitten by her intriguing dense eyes and beaming confidence. His last entry said that he was to meet Sara at his house for a dinner date. This was the night he was murdered, making Sara the prime suspect. The police were onto it.

*****

She sat in the Starbucks café, sipping her coffee and staring out of the window. The blood stained knife lay next to her handbag, covered with her blue scarf. Iraa hadn’t gone home. She did not want to be alone. The table by the window overseeing Nariman road was her preferred place. Iraa loved coming here. The aroma of freshly brewed coffee relaxed her senses. Today, though, was different. She gulped the last sip of her third Espresso Latte, feeling anything but relaxed.

Iraa was a complete introvert. She had a short stature and lean body, defined by her elementary dressing style and negligible make up. Iraa was the kind of girl who would go unnoticed if she sat in the middle of the road. Confidence had never been her forte. Her life was a shell that was almost impenetrable. She had very few friends, none very close.

Who could do this to me? And why? She had never harmed anyone.

Her gray cat eyes looked tired and weary. She hadn’t got a lot of sleep lately. Her tiny oval face appeared pale. She tried to get up and leave, but realized that her skinny weak legs were still shaking. Helpless, she sat down and ordered another Latte’. She somehow managed to put together her jet black hair with some help from her blue colored band. Sleep had eluded her until 4 am last night. When the alarm rang at 7, she felt like it had only been ten minutes since she slept. Reluctantly, she had forced herself out of bed, got ready and rushed to work. It was in office that she first stumbled upon the strange object in her purse, while reaching out for her notepad. She had frantically rushed into the washroom and covered it with her scarf, careful enough nobody had seen it. Shortly after, she left. Iraa contemplated going to the cops, but then decided against it. Not until she knew more. There was no one she could think of going for help. She was helpless.

The last few months had been strange and weird. Paranoia had engulfed her and she found herself falling into bouts of depression. A kind of eeriness surrounded her being. She was sure somebody had been following her, watching her every move. Moreover, she had been experiencing excessive forgetfulness and blackouts. It was the sleeping pills, she convinced herself. But it just kept getting worse. On a couple of occasions, she had found herself waking up at places she had no recollection of coming to. She had lost her phone and had no idea how or when. Things were slipping beyond her control. A blood stained knife, the origins of which she had no clue about, was the last thing she wanted.

*****

Timmy was seated at the Versova police station.

“I have already told you everything Sir. Vicky was not only my roommate but my best friend. I want it more than anybody to know who did this to him.”

The police had recovered Vicky’s body in the bushes near Versova beach. He had been stabbed.

“Vicky did not come home that evening. He had informed me that he was going out with Dorothy after office. When he didn’t come home, I guessed he must be staying over. I was meeting some old mates over drinks and returned home pretty late. That’s why I didn’t call him. It was only after I got a call from the police next morning that I knew what had happened.” Timmy still appeared shaken. He was yet to come to terms with the tragedy.

“Tell us more about the girl. Name, appearance, every minute detail.” ordered Inspector Salaskar’s grave firm voice. Virat Salaskar was a man fully committed to his work. He was unmarried and lived alone in a 2BHK apartment. Unsolved cases were his only companions.

“I have met her on couple of occasions. Dorothy seems like a smart girl, warm and affectionate. Her catty framed specs make her look nerdier than she is. She is a law student from Pune. Visits her grandparents in Mumbai on the weekends. She and Vicky met at an art gallery. Both bonded big time over art. I remember a portrait of Vicky that she had made. It was exquisite. Do you think that she might have…Not a chance, Sir. She is a very sweet girl. Plus they both got along really well. She absolutely admired him. She could never harm him”.

“No one’s asking for your judgment kid. Just do what is asked. Have you spoken to her about it yet?”

“No Sir. She’ll take it hard. I don’t know how to tell her.”

“Call her. Tell her that Vicky has been in an accident. Ask her to come. Don’t say anything else.”

******

Sara was fuming. Ashley was being too rude. But Sara knew that she was dependent on her. It was Ashley who had convinced her to go out with Ryan, and now that she was starting to like him, Ashley wanted her to cut it off. Sara was afraid of Ashley’s temper and today she was on the threshold of losing it. She knew she had no option but to succumb to Ashley. She was so excited about meeting Ryan again. But she wouldn’t dare do anything against Ashley’s will.

******

Dorothy saw a couple of missed calls on her phone. It was Timmy. It’s probably just Vicky calling from Timmy’s phone. The idiot never has his phone charged. Let him be. I’ll call him once I’m free. Hopefully, the next time he’ll remember to charge his phone.

******

It had been two days since the incident. Iraa was refilling her water bottle, still lost in thoughts, when Richard passed by.

“Heya Sexy! What’s up with that frog face? Didn’t catch a lot of sleep last night, eh? Looks like you had some company. Who’s the lucky guy?” Richard said with a wicked smile as he turned away.

Richard had always given Iraa the creeps. She felt uncomfortable around him. Her hatred for him was no secret. It had occurred to Iraa that he might be the one messing with her. As she strolled back to her cubicle, she saw Richard at her desk, going through her Facebook. Her normally timid and hesitant demeanor transformed as her face turned red with consuming anger, eyes flashing and body quivering with burning rage. Words slurred out of her mouth like an erupting volcano.

Her co-workers stared in awe. They had never seen this side of her. It was as if she was a completely different person.

“What the f**k do you want from me you prick?!” she screamed. “I’ve had enough of you. Do you think I don’t know what you’ve been up to? You’ve been following me, haven’t you? And that stupid prank that you played the other day. It’s all a joke to you, isn’t it? Show your face again and I’ll have you behind bars”

*****

Iraa was thinking about today. She couldn’t believe that she snapped like that. She was starting to feel that she had been unfair to Richard. There was no proof that it was him. She started to feel a little guilty. May be I over reacted. The microwave had just finished heating the food when the doorbell rang. She wasn’t expecting company. Who could it be at this hour?

It was Richard.

“What are you doing here?”

“Easy. I just came here to talk. Clear the air. I’ve been how I’ve been, that’s how I am and I’m sorry for that. I never meant anything, that’s just how I speak. I don’t blame you for being mad. But what was the rest all about? Bashing me in everyone’s presence with all those lies. Not fair girl. Not cool”.

Iraa still hated him but she knew that she had crossed the line. She was embarrassed of her behavior.

“I’m sorry Richard. It’s just that I’ve been under a lot of stress lately and today after you said those things to me and then when I saw you at my table, I snapped. I shouldn’t have said all those things. Why don’t you come in and I’ll make you some coffee. It’s the least I could do.”

Fifteen minutes later, as she took another sip from the cup, Iraa started to feel a little uneasy. Her head felt light, vision blurred. She was gasping for air. The son of a bi**h drugged me. I should never have trusted him. Her heart pounded heavily as a rush of black clouds pressed into her vision, making her dizzy. And then there was darkness.

******

Inspector Salaskar was livid. There was still no word on Dorothy. Her phone had been out of reach since the day Timmy had called. The phone’s last location was traced to near the Bandra-Worli sea link. Nothing after. There was no record of a Dorothy in any law college in Pune. All they had was a sketch of hers through Timmy.

******

“Don’t cry like a little girl” Ashley yelled. “I created you for a reason. Your job is done; it’s time for you to go. What will you do here anyway? All you did in life was love that stupid guy. Now he’s gone. Your existence has no meaning anymore”

She’s right. I need to go, thought Dorothy.

“Fine. But before I go, just tell me why did you do it?”

“Revenge. Vengeance. She has forgotten her past. But I won’t. She’s too weak to face it. She needs me”.

 

“Shadows known before, feel heavy, harder to see. An apt Kill.

They believe what’s not real, I only see the Thrill.

What used to be real, what used to be…?”

 

An overwhelming sense of achievement engulfed Ashley.

******

Iraa woke up with a scream. She had seen a bad dream. She was running away from something, on a straight road which had no end. She turned back to see who she was running from. It was Richard. Suddenly, reality hit her. She remembered blacking out after… Oh no! She ran to the bathroom and quickly removed her clothes. Nervously, she examined her body. Nothing. Thank god. She pulled her tracks up and hurried out. The clock read 10am. F**k, I’m late again. She picked up the receiver.

“Hi Steve, I’m sorry I’m gonna be late. I’ll tell you what happened later. It was Rich….”

“Iraa, listen to me”, Stephen interrupted before she could finish. “There’s a situation. Richard is dead”.

“What do you mean dead?” She was barely audible.

“He’s dead Iraa. The police found his body in a dump this morning. He was stabbed to death”

Iraa froze, her body trembling. Color drained from her face as she stood there staring in abyss not knowing what to do. Richard was here last night, with me. He drugged me. And now he’s dead.

******

Inspector Maria was going through the contents of Ryan’s diary once more to hunt for more clues. It had been a dead end so far. The boy was clearly in love with this Sara girl, he thought as he read out a passage-

‘As she lay besides me, holding my hand, her intense eyes locked into mine, mumbling the words that made me experience bliss like never before-

“Shadows known before, feel heavy, harder to see. An apt Kill.

They believe what’s not real, I only see the Thrill.

What used to be real, what used to be…?”

******

Iraa sat in the Metro. She was on her way to office. Her world had crumbled once more. The memories of her horrific past came flooding back. All these years she had suppressed them. Memories of her abusive alcoholic father, coming home every night and thrashing her mother and then her. Her father’s acts had forced her to detest every man she met. The stains of my past would haunt me forever. My life is worthless.

The lady sitting besides could notice the pain on Iraa’s face. She saw her close her eyes and cover her face with her hands. A couple of minutes later she woke up. The expressions on her face had changed. The sad and anxious look was replaced by a determined and confident one.

“Are you all right” the lady asked.

“Perfect”. A stern reply.

“I couldn’t help but notice that something was worrying you. So I asked. I’m Rachael by the way. Nice to meet you”

“So thoughtful of you Rachael”, the voice said in a cold uninterested tone. “I’m Ashley, Nice to meet you too” she said before turning away and humming something,

“Shadows known before, feel heavy, harder to see. An apt Kill.

They believe what’s not real, I only see the Thrill.

What used to be real, what used to be…?”
__END__