“Why me?” I asked myself again and again. Days had turned to nightmares. Someone was haunting me from outside and inside of me. “What did it want from me? Was it a hate crime? Someones’s grudge perhaps,” I wondered. There was horror in my life. It felt like a slow process of destruction of me. I was suffering silently. My body ached with pain. Yes, I was in the midst of ‘a invisible holocaust’ this unbelievable, inexplicable phenomena. There was a secret way to escape death. I wished to explore and survive…
I researched historical facts about Hitler. The terrifying experience felt like the holocaust. There was a direct link between Hitler and the Jews. Someone was out there to seek revenge of their past but why me? I looked up my astrological chart to better understand myself, my nature, qualities, and so on. I discovered that the negative force did not want me to have good luck, health, and peace. These three elements were absolute necessities of life. My well-being threatened, dreams unfulfilled, the evil force controlled my fate and destiny.
Finding the villain in my life was a task. I searched my memory. My intuition pointed to a school friend. At age 18, she had introduced me to a religious guru in India named ‘Laxman.’ He had special powers to do good to people, to help people. I had spiritually fallen in love with him. Though he was mysteriously eccentric, I had respected him greatly. I was in awe of him. He had won my trust, confidence and later betrayed me. It dawned on me that he had misused his powers to harm me by taking revenge.
I wanted to confirm my research findings. I contacted a well-known psychic, Emelina. She spoke to me and told me, “The evil has manipulated your good qualities to bad qualities and changed you.” I agreed with her because I observed that my family had begun to treat me cruelly at home. Physical health suffered immensely. I had chronic diseases along with depression. Career remained affected as I could not hold on to any job. Social life suffered too because friendships did not last either.
Along with Emelina’s Reading about my life and my research findings, I concluded Laxman’s animosity towards me had direct connection between Germany’s deep historical roots to the holocaust, the Indian caste system and the Indian mythology. According to Hitler, the Nazis belonged to a superior Aryan race, a ‘pure’ race. This was another reason the Jews were racially discriminated and victims of the holocaust. Laxman considered me inferior because he belonged to the Brahmin caste – the learned scholars while I belonged to the Vaishnava caste – the business people. Brahmins are Aryans, a ‘pure race’ while Vaishnavas are not. Also, in Indian mythology, Brahmins worshipped Lord Shiva-God of destruction. Therefore, Laxman played the role of Lord Shiva to destroy me.
I felt destroyed because nothing was going right by being trapped in a concentric ring of problems. I was financially insecure most of the time. Having failed the Praxis exam, I was unable to teach in a school in New Jersey. I did not have a Teaching licence which would have fetched me a decent, steady income. Also, my family forced me to marry an illegal guy in U.S.A . He divorced me after getting his Green Card through me. I returned to India only to discover that my family was forcing me again to marry a rich, young guy for his money.
By age 40, I felt stuck by treacherous people in my life. I was miserably alone, lost in a dark forest. Hopefully there was light at the other end. I was ready to pay a fee for seeking professional advice. Emelina offered to help me out. She had a good grasping of my problem. Having faith in her, I paid a fee of $10,000 and more. She convinced me she would be able to get me out of the miserable life I was living. Though I lost all my savings for my recovery back to life, I was desperate because I had lived hell on earth and narrowly escaped death. Emelina reversed the process of my ‘near destruction’ with positive energy. She meditated, chanted, prayed to God to help me live again.
Freedom came to me at a heavy cost. Emelina and I ended the problem which was just worsening. It led to my re-birth in the same life which also took many years. I am happy to live again. Having lost my innocence, today I am a wiser, smarter, and stronger person. I am a giving, helpful, and a compassionate person. I learned to accept my flaws and mistakes I committed in the past. Most importantly, I learned to keep up balance in life. There was chaos, sorrow, stagnation in my life for long periods of time but there was personal growth too.
Teaching primary school children, tutoring French, and promoting better health are my future projects. Finally, I am ready to begin a new chapter in my life… A dead soul has revived back to life…A dead soul awakens to a peaceful sunshine after the storm…