I started from the hotel after having some snacks as the lunch time had already passed and it was 3:30pm. I would be reaching Bangalore in another hour and a half from where I would be starting my search for Neha.
She was right, I had never helped anyone until someone had come to me in seek of any help. I had never shared a friendly relationship with my staff. I always considered them as subordinates working for me. I never tried to understand their problems. I had never stopped by to help some blind or an old age person cross the road. When there were people begging near my car at any traffic signal, I never cared to open my car window and offer some help to them. Let alone help I never cared to have a look at them.
These were some petty things we don’t think about but when someone makes you realise these things, it affects you deeply. It makes you think for a while what you are as an individual, which forced me to think that day.
**
To add more to my day, the bus’s tyre punctured and our bus stopped just few kilometres away from Vellore. “Looks like everything has to happen on one day. What next now”? I asked Neha.
“Its just about 2kms from here. Lets walk. There is no point in waiting”.
“I guess so. Lets do this also”.
“As I promised you, this will be a memorable day for you”.
“With so many things happening, how could one forget this day”.
“You are complaining again”?
“There is no point in complaining now. I don’t think I would be able to bag that deal”.
“Memories are far more precious than any deal Mr Sunil”.
“You can say that as you are still in college”.
“The way you are I don’t think you were carefree during your college days”.
“I had lot of responsibility. There was no time for these things”.
“We should always make time for what we like doing about. Live like there is no tomorrow. Responsibilities can always be taken care of”.
With all that talking we reached Vellore. She insisted if we could go inside the golden temple. It was already 12:45pm and I had realised there was no point in hurrying. I called my team in Chennai and asked them to check if the meeting could be postponed. I agreed to go with her to the temple.
Vellore golden temple was a spiritual park situated at the foot of a small range of green hills in a place known as Malaikodi. The name golden temple itself says that the temple was made with gold covering. Every single detail was manually created. The salient feature was the Lakshmi Narayani Temple or Mahalakshmi temple.
I had always heard about this temple but never been though I had travelled this route several times. Sapna always insisted to go here but due to my busy schedule it never really happened. But now I was here in some unimaginable situation with a girl about whom I don’t have any clue at all. God knows when and how to call us to him.
“Wow!! What a beautiful place. Have you ever been here”? asked Neha.
“No this is my first time”. I said.
“What!! You are I guess about 33 or 34 years and in these many years, you have not at all been to this temple even once”!!!
“What’s so odd in it? Never had such occasion. Even for you its a first time”.
“With me its different. But you had all the privilege. Anyways, come on lets go inside”.
“Make it bit fast. I have to reach Chennai also”.
“Ok ok, but don’t you think its bit too late now”.
“Ya I know but I have postponed for an hour. So I still have chance”.
“Hmm, but first enjoy this moment here. Its so divine. Don’t you feel relaxed here”.
“It sure does and I am grateful for you that you got me here”.
“Anytime dude. Wow everything is so beautiful here. Hey we will have the prasadam and go ok”.
“But I don’t have enough time for that”.
“Then make time, I am super hungry you see. Can’t wait any longer now”.
We stood in a line for prasadam. All this was a whole new experience for me. She was showing me a world which I never thought existed.
“Yum, isn’t it wonderful”? she asked.
“Sorry I didn’t realise you were hungry”.
“Its ok dude. No complaints now though. The food is so delicious”.
“You know you are one typical character. With all your cool type looks I thought you are one spoilt, careless brat but you are so different Neha”.
“Wow thanks if that was a compliment. Well you are also not that bad as you pretend to look like”.
“Oh really, thanks for that. Shall I ask you something”?
“Go on, you can ask me anything”.
“Why have you kept your hair so short? I mean normally girls love long hair right”?
“Ho ho, how many girls you know Mr? Anyways I like looking different from others. You just now said that I am one typical character”, she winked at me.
**
I reached Bangalore as per my plan around 5:15pm. Anurag was waiting for me with the keys at my office.
“Here are your keys and this is the list of colleges you had asked for Sir”, says Anurag.
“Thank you Anurag. I really appreciate it. You can now leave”.
I call Sapna to inform about my safe arrival.
“Hello Sapna”?
“Did you reach”? she asks me.
“Yes just now. Going home now. Will start from there tomorrow”.
“Hmm, all the best Sunil. Hope you find her”.
Yes, I needed those best wishes very badly. I was trying to find someone only with a hope in my heart. I had always been adamant on things I wanted. This was one such thing. I wanted her at any cost, either by hook or by crook. I was not going to let go this time. She had to be with me while going back from here. Bangalore is not at all a new place for me and I was sure about finding her.
**
We finished our prasadam. We had god darshan and then proceeded towards the bus stand from where we had to catch the bus for Chennai.
“It was very nice. Thanks”, she thanked me.
“Why are you thanking me”? I asked her surprisingly.
“To bringing me here. I am so grateful to you”.
“Well I didn’t get you, we came by chance you see”.
“Hmm but still, you were the reason for it. Had I not met you today, then I might have never come here”.
“Well, which college you study”?
“Looks like someone wants to know everything about me huh”?
“Nothing like that. Just keeping on with the conversation you see”.
“Then lets talk something about you”.
“Like”?
“Hmm, what are your hobbies”?
“Well, good question. No one ever asked me this in a long time now”.
“Now don’t say you don’t have any hobbies dude”.
I decided to hire a car from Vellore as the bus would take a long time for us to reach there.
“Luckily found this car. I had to urge him to let me drive by paying more. Thank goodness for that”, I said after hiring a car.
“Why do you want to attend this meeting so badly”? she asked me.
“Because I have been trying for this deal from quite a long time now. Finally they are ready to meet me”.
“Do you know something, the more we urge for something, the more we get disappointed. Just let it go and do your work, if you are destined to get then no matter what you will get it”.
“But I don’t like giving up. I will try and try until I win”.
“Are you in a race with someone here. Why do you want to win, what or to whom do you want to prove anything”?
“It gives me pleasure. I feel happy”.
“Without enjoying life’s best moments with your loved ones, what’s the use even if you win an entire empire. You can always earn money but you can never get those special moments back”.
It again started raining but not heavily though.
“How did you meet your fiancee”? she asked me.
“She is an interior decorator. We met during one of her workshop event where I was the guest”.
“Was it love at first sight”?
“What!! No, I mean I liked her work. She is really good at her job. So I gave her contract for one part of my office which I wanted to renovate”.
“So you started to meet daily, spend more time with each other and finally you were in love right”?
“Not exactly. We started to meet daily of course but our conversations always included only work related matters. She was seeing someone at that time”.
“Oh, then how did it clicked between you”?
“For few days she took off from work. I mean her workers were there but she was not coming to check the work”.
“And…….”.
“You want to know all the details, don’t you”?
“Only if you want to”.
I then started to tell her about my love story. Sapna had took off from work for few days. I gave her a call to check if everything was fine. She didn’t answer my calls. So I directly went to her house to check with her. She was in a terrible state. Her eyes were all red and swollen. It seemed like she was crying for a long time. I then asked her about the matter. She initially tried to brush off but when insisted she opened up. She said how her boyfriend had ditched her to get married to someone from the States so that he could settle overseas. She was seeing him for about an year and also been physical with him. She cried and cried hugging me. I consoled her saying not to worry and there is no point in crying for someone like him. It was the first time I had ever talked to any girl like that. She was shocked to hear that I never had any relationships. I was so involved with my work and business I never really found time for emotional bonding. We then regularly started to see each other and I started enjoying her company. Then after about 2 years I finally proposed her.
**
“Yes Sapna, I am on my way to check with the colleges”, I answered on phone.
“Ok but there are so many colleges in Bangalore Sunil”.
“I know but there is no other way. I don’t want to leave any stone unturned”.
“Ok, keep me updated”.
“Sure sure”.
I still remember the day when I had proposed Sapna. She was so happy and excited. She is a very easy person to talk to. She always gave me my space. But still I have hurt her so many times. I never understood her at times but she was always there for me. The first time we made love I was totally lost in her. She is every man’s dream but I am the lucky one to have her. If not for that day I would have lost Sapna.
Now I was on my way to first college in Bangalore hoping for some luck. I didn’t even know her family name. This would be the biggest challenge for me.
**
“Wow, amazing but bit of boring love story”, said Neha once I had done with my story.
“Boring, what’s so boring in that”?
“Well, not very romantic. Do you go on regular candle light dinners or celebrate your love anniversary or something of that sort”?
“I don’t have time for all these things you see. We do go out on dinners. In fact today is our third anniversary”.
“What!!! Are you serious”? she jumped from the seat.
“Hey cool, this day comes every year. What if we celebrate after two days or so. This meeting was very important to me as well”.
“Dude, if I were your girlfriend, believe me I would have left you by now. I mean I understand work is important but what’s the use of earning so much when you don’t have time for the one you love”.
“These all look good in movies. Actual life is totally different. You are living in a dream world”.
“May be but you are a big dreamer than I am. You want to attend some meeting you are not even sure of being successful. Just think, is it worth breaking someone’s heart”?
These words from her changed something in me. She was right. Was it worth it. It was 3pm and still there was long to go.
“Hello, am I talking to Mr. Vasu”? I asked on phone pulling my car to one side.
“Yes Sir, what time you will be reaching”?
“See I don’t think I would be able to make it. So just cancel the meeting and fix it some other day”.
“But Sir, if cancelled today then it would take a long time to get another appointment”.
“I know but I can’t make it today. Just cancel the appointment”.
“Are you sure Sir”?
“Yes Mr. Vasu, please do it”.
Neha was shocked to see me cancelling my important meeting for which I had took all this pain. Being few hours with her I was slowly starting to realise the real meaning of life. One project gone would not have made much difference. I should have realised it much earlier but better late than never. So I decided the rest of the day to spend with Neha to see the world through her eyes.
“I don’t believe this!! You cancelled your meeting”, she was asking me.
“Yes, there is no way I could make it on time”.
“So what next now”?
“First we will go back and return this car. From there we will take a bus back to Bangalore and collect my car from the mechanic”.
“You in bus again, are you sure”?
“Yes I am sure. Half of the day gone, lets spend the next half in your way. To the fullest….”
“Dude, you are amazing. I don’t believe I was able to change your mindset”.
“So, will you show me the real world then”?
“Of course dude. I will show you how to live life to the fullest, to live like there is no tomorrow”.
We then went back and returned the car at Vellore. From there we went towards the bus stand and waited for the bus to Bangalore. I was enjoying this trip now. Letting out all my frustration I decided to live like there is no tomorrow and that too with someone like Neha, there was no doubt it would be fun.
“So did you call your fiancee”? she asked me waiting at the bus stop.
“No, why are you asking”?
“Call her and ask for sorry”.
“But its too late now and…..”
“Better late than never, have you not heard about it. I am sure she would forget everything and will be very happy”.
“How do you know that”?
“Because I am also a girl and one sorry from a boyfriend makes all the difference”.
“Oh, that means you too have someone”.
“Well that I will tell you later. But for now call her”.
“Ok, if you insist”.
I called Sapna. She was shocked to hear me. Before I could apologise she started to say sorry about her behaviour and she said she should have understood it was important to me. For the first time I felt disgusted about myself. I then cut her in between and apologised to her. As Neha said, she was very happy and also shocked because I had never apologised to her or anyone.
*
“What’s the name”? the office clerk in the college asked me after convincing him for a while.
“Its Neha”.
“Neha what, what’s the surname”? he asked me again.
“Sorry I don’t know her surname”.
“What Sir, there will be so many Nehas. You don’t know her surname. At least do you know which branch she is in”?
“I think Commerce. Search in final year Commerce”.
“Ok give me a second please”.
He started to search in his register. This was the 10th college I was searching and there was no luck yet. Everywhere they used to ask the same question, “what’s the surname”? For the first time in my life I realised how important is someone’s surname. I had only given them information about her branch Commerce, her first name and that her parents run some orphanage and old age homes. Here also he didn’t find any Neha. I had to go empty handed from here also.
**
“You were right, Sapna was very happy”. I said to Neha.
“See I told you. Not only this you have to arrange something special for her once you reach Bangalore“.
“Like what. I am not very good at these things”.
“Hmm, I don’t know what she saw in you to fall in love with you. You are not at all romantic”.
“Oh please, I don’t know to express but I do love her”.
“Then just think everyday like you will be meeting her for the last time. What all would you do”.
“But why would I be meeting for the last time”.
“Because if you stay the same, then one or the other day she is definitely going to leave you. Every girl has some dreams. She loves you, supports you in every aspect and in return asks only for your love and time. Is that too much.. There is nothing wrong in expressing your love. Just express and see how she will glow. Trust me, your boring life could turn into interesting one”.
We then got into bus to Bangalore.
“Ok now enough about me. Tell something about you now”, I asked her.
“What you want to know, about my love life”?
“Ya if you want to”.
“Well I have never been in any serious relationship though I had few boyfriends. I just recently broke up with one guy”.
“Oh, may I know the reason. You don’t have to answer if its too personal”.
“Don’t be so formal dude. Well he had many expectations which I knew I wouldn’t be able to fulfil”.
“Like…”
“Like he wanted to get married, have kids and blah blah….”.
“And you didn’t wanted that”?
“Dude, who knows what happens next. We are not sure about next moment then how can we plan long term commitments. Like for example, did you know that you will be cancelling your important meeting and will be stuck with a girl who is a total stranger to you? No right, then how could I have promised him all those things”.
She was right, too much expectations from life was also not good. We plan something but life has some other plans for us.
“How many girls did you date before your fiancee”? she asked me.
“None”.
“What!! But why, I mean you are not bad by your looks. Oh may be because of your attitude I guess”.
“Nothing like that. There were few girls crazy about me during my college days but I was not interested”.
“Hmm, shall I ask something personal now”?
“What’s that”?
“You didn’t make out with any girl before your fiancee”?
“Well to be honest, I had been physical with one girl in college. That’s it. After that it was only with Sapna”.
“Hmm, was she from your college”?
“Yes, she was from my class itself and she was trying with me for a long time. That day also it would have not been happened if I had not been drunk”.
“Oh, you lost your senses. Share the details please, I will not tell to anyone”.
I knew Neha wouldn’t let it go unless I told her everything. So I told her about my first ever physical relationship. She was from my class and she had a huge crush on me. I knew that. She was very beautiful and had many guys go crazy for her. I liked her but not in other way. That day was our send off party as we were in our final year. We all were having a blast. I usually don’t drink much but that day all my friends forced me for drinks and I drank like a fish. She asked me for a dance. After sometime I was feeling uneasy so she took me to her place. She used to rent an apartment. I was lying on a couch. She came next to me and held my hands. She then slowly kissed me on my cheeks. First I tried to push her but then she again came close to me. She then kissed me on my lips. She took my hands and put it around her waist. She put her arms around me. That’s it, there was no stopping after that. We had sex. But the next morning I made it clear to her that it was only a mistake. She said not to worry and it was only fun. She had only crush on me and nothing serious.
**
“I have covered almost 25 colleges now. Still no luck”, I was telling to Sapna on phone.
“Don’t stress too much Sunil. Go home and take some rest. You can start again tomorrow”.
“Ya you are right. It’s 6pm now and anyhow all colleges will be closed”.
“You will find her Sunil. Don’t worry”.
“Thanks Sapna and thanks for letting me do this. No one could have understood better than you. I love you, take care”.
“Love you too Sunil”.
First day had gone without any luck. I was bit frustrated but it was not time to get frustrated. Sapna had given me full support. After all every girl wants her better half to be on her side with wedding shopping but here I had left her alone to take care of everything. She is a gem of person.
I came back home. I prepared myself some dinner and then after watching television for sometime I went to sleep to start all over again tomorrow.
**
“Wow, interesting man. If she was so beautiful why didn’t you wanted to have any relationship with her”? Neha asked me after I finished telling her all that.
“Well, I never got such feelings for her. More over she was not my type”.
“And what’s your type? May be someone who will always talk to you about work related or business deals right”?
“Please, I am not that boring also. At least not in college”.
“Hmm, you know the guy with whom I recently broke up, was one of the best guy I had ever met. He loved me deeply and I felt very bad to break up with him”.
“You could have explained your situation to him”.
“My situation, then there would have been another problem”, she almost said to herself..
“Sorry come again”, I didn’t hear her properly.
“Nothing, god I want to go to toilet. When will this driver stop man”.
“Oh should I ask him to stop”.
“No its ok, he may stop anytime now”.
As soon as she said the bus halted for sometime.
“Wow, I feel so relaxed now”, she said as if she had won something.
“Can make out by the look on your face”.
“Don’t you want to go to toilet”? she asked me.
“No I am fine”.
“I know, you have the habit of going to only neat and clean toilets but dude learn to adjust yourself to any situation. Life becomes easier”.
“But seriously I don’t feel like going”.
“Ok as you wish but hey come on lets have a coffee”.
“Here, in this stall”?
“Again making faces. You said you want to see the real life right. Now come on this is the real life. You wouldn’t have had better coffee than this”.
“You sure”?
“Absolutely. All your five star coffees are nothing in front of this. I bet you will love it. Now come on dude”.
“Ok lets see this also. After all who can win you in these arguments”.
“Very funny. Now come”, and she drags me to go with her.
She was right. That coffee tasted very nice. Something like a real coffee. She also taught me the art of having the coffee.
“See hold like this and now pour the coffee onto the saucer”, she was guiding me to drink a coffee in a full local manner.
“Ok, like this”?
“Yes, now drink from the saucer like this, slurp…”, she made sound almost audible to most of the people around. But when I turn around almost everyone were drinking the same way.
“Wow, this does taste good. How do you know all these things”?
“Well I travel a lot you see. These are all petty things but life’s most fun moments lies in these petty things dude”.
“You are right. Everyone should learn from you to lead a life. Wish all could get a fate like you”.
“Like me? No dude, no one should get a fate like me”.
“What do you mean”?
“I mean drink your coffee fast because the bus will be leaving anytime now”.
“Oh yes, slurp……….”.
We then got back into the bus.
“Dude, don’t you have any special quality in you. I mean everyone has one or the other thing. Like me, I love talking to strangers and making new friends”, she asked me.
“Well I was a great artist. I used to do sketches of people”.
“What do you mean by was, don’t you do now”?
“Now, well after dad’s death I got so involved with business, I don’t really remember when was the last time I sketched something”.
“Then no problem, I will give you a chance. Sketch my picture”.
“Neha we are in a bus now. And I don’t think I have it in me anymore”.
“Talents never get lost anywhere Mr. I am sure you can still sketch. Even a moving bus can’t stop you. Now come on”.
“I don’t have paper or pencil or……..”.
“Excuses and excuses. Here have this paper and pencil. My bag always contains all these things. You know I will not let it go”.
“You are impossible. Ok, I will try but don’t laugh if its not good”.
**
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