Our wedding date was fixed and it was after 3 months.
“Do you think its too early”? Sapna asked me about the wedding date.
“I think its too late”, I winked at her.
“Sunil…. how will we manage within three months. There is so much to do”.
“Your parents might have thought about it love. Don’t you worry”.
“They said that if not after three months then there is no date for next two years”.
“Oh my god, I can’t wait that long now”.
“Really, I don’t believe you”.
“Tell me what should I do to prove you wrong”.
“Just promise me one thing, that you will never ever change”.
“I promise Sapna. I have realised that this is the real me. These many years I was living according to rules but not anymore”.
“Hey why don’t you invite that girl Neha to our wedding”?
“I don’t know anything about her Sapna”.
“Then try to find out Sunil. I really want to meet her”.
Sapna’s suggestion made me to think about the matter now. I do wanted to track down Neha and I guess nothing is better than having her on my wedding. Somewhere, directly or indirectly she was responsible for this wedding.
If I had not met her that day, then I guess I would be still running behind to flourish my business and ignore my personal life. If not for her then I would have lost Sapna, my love, forever.
I didn’t know how to start her search and I didn’t had enough time as well. There were lot of things I had to concentrate on. I had bagged that Chennai deal and right now was working on that. I had few business meetings as well.
Anurag was the only and best person I could think of. I had to tell him the whole incident about Neha and asked him if he could help me in my search as I personally can’t afford enough time. He readily agreed to help me and I knew he would never turn me down.
“I don’t have enough details about her Anurag except for her name”, I said while discussing about how to track down Neha.
“Do you know her full name Sir”? he asked me.
“No Anurag. I know only her fist name. I don’t know where she lives or which college she studies. I don’t have any information about it”.
“I will make the list of colleges in Bangalore and see if we can have any luck”.
Anurag tried his best to find Neha but even after two months he didn’t had any clue about her. He was very sorry about it though I knew it was not his fault. Only a month was left for our wedding and we went to Madikeri, Sapna’s hometown.
I decided that I will search for Neha personally. Sapna was not very comfortable of me leaving her at this time but I was left with no other option. I wanted that one person to be on my wedding who had changed my life. I had promised Neha that I would track her down and I guess the time has come to find her.
***
“Sorry Sir, we cannot disclose any details about anyone unless you have any permission letter from higher authority”, said the lady at the orphanage centre when I tried to ask her about Neha.
“From where should I get the permission? I am not asking any details, I am just asking if I could meet her”, I was trying to explain.
“Look Sir, our madam is not there at the moment. Its up to her who meets the girls here. Without her consent I can’t let you to meet anyone”.
“Ok, where can I find your madam then”?
“She has gone to her hometown to attend some wedding. She will be coming back only after three days”.
“Three days!!! Look its very important for me to meet her. I have my own wedding in two weeks. I have come to invite that girl. She is a very good friend of mine”.
“Rules are rules Sir. You are not allowed to meet her without the permission”.
“But at least you can check if that girl still stays here? I will not bother you after that. Please Mam, its really important”.
That lady was not ready to listen what I was trying to say. She was very adamant at her words. Another three days was a long wait for me. Sapna’s parents had come, her brother would be coming soon. I was standing there helpless. Why is this becoming so difficult. I am here at her doorstep yet so far from her. I didn’t even know if Neha still stays here.
“Excuse me, excuse me”, I called one of the girl who had come out from the orphanage.
“Yes…”?, she turned around with a puzzled look.
“Hi, I am Sunil. Look I need some help from you. Can you please tell me if Neha still stays here”?
“Neha…, sorry we are not allowed to tell about anyone to any stranger”.
“Do all of you have the same slogan here”?, I got little annoyed now.
“Yes and Mr if you want to know anything then please wait till our madam comes back”, and she started to go.
“Hey hey, look I am sorry. I didn’t mean that”, I tried to stop her. I explained her everything about how important it is for me to meet Neha.
“I understand, but I don’t want to get involved in any problem. The rules here are very strict especially after the incident just two weeks back”, she said.
“What incident”? I asked her.
“Two guys had come to meet one girl here. They said they were her friends which was true because that girl knew about them”.
“And…….”
“They took her with them. Our Mam was not there at that moment. Then the girl returned next day in a very bad condition. They had tried to sell her to someone but luckily she somehow saved herself from them”.
“Oh that’s very bad”.
“Yes, after that incident, no one is allowed to meet or take any girl with them unless it is approved by our Mam even the girl knows about them”.
“Look, I am not that kind of person. I would meet her only after taking permission from your Mam but before that I just want to know if she still stays here”.
Finally the girl agreed.
“Ok, what name did you say”? she asked me.
“Neha, Neha K. She was doing her graduation in Bangalore but then she left the college this year which was her final year”.
“Neha…..hmm…. I came here only three weeks back. In these three weeks I have not heard about this Neha”.
“Oh……. that means she doesn’t stay here anymore then”.
“Look I am sorry I couldn’t help you but I can do you one favour”, she said seeing my helplessness.
“What’s that”?
“I can give my Mam’s contact number. You can call her and explain her everything”.
“Oh that ‘s a brilliant idea. Its very nice of you”.
“But you should promise me that I would not be in any trouble”.
“Trust me, I don’t even know your name. So how would you be in trouble”.
That girl gave me the senior in-charge’s mobile number. Now this was the only means to find out about Neha.
“Yes Sapna, tell me”, Sapna called me in between and the girl went on her way.
“Did you reach there? Could you find her”? she asked me.
“No Sapna, not yet”, I then told her everything that happened here.
“What next Sunil”?
“That girl has given me the number of senior in-charge. I will try calling her now”.
“Ok, brother will be coming tonight”.
“Yes Sapna, I know that. If she don’t give me any details, then I guess I have to stop all this”.
“Don’t worry Sunil, you have come this far. I am sure you will not come back empty handed”.
“Thanks for your support Sapna”.
“Anytime Sunil, take care, love you”.
“Love you too”.
Every effort I was making to find out about Neha was not taking me anywhere. If this lady also decides not to speak to me, then there is no point of my search and I will have to go back with those words from Neha, “if we are destined to meet, then we will meet”.
“I am trying her phone continuously but its not reachable”, I was telling to Sapna on phone.
“Hope you have got the right number”.
“That girl gave me this number. It should be right”.
“May be there is no coverage in her hometown”.
“I think so. Sapna, is it ok if I stay back till she returns”.
“But Sunil you don’t even know if Neha still resides there”.
“I know but I am not finding any alternative way”.
“Look I don’t mind if you stay back but what is the use if she don’t live there. I don’t think they will give you her details if she has moved from there”.
“I don’t know why but I feel she is still here”.
“But Sunil, you can continue your search after the wedding right”?
“I can but Sapna I wanted her to attend our wedding, that’s the reason I took so much pain. Don’t you think it will all go waste”?
“You are right, stay back Sunil. At least you don’t have to regret later. Its just I am missing you”.
Even I was missing Sapna. I wanted to be next to her helping out in the preparations. But I am not feeling like going back. Somehow I am getting a strong feeling that Neha is still around me and calling me. That girl said she has never heard about Neha but she can be wrong. Neha never mixes with anyone. May be that could be the reason she has never heard about her. I know this is too unlikely.
I can explain my situation to the senior in-charge and get her details. May be she can understand everything. With so many concerns running around in my mind, I again tried her number and this time luckily it got connected.
“Hello, hello Mam this is Sunil here. I want to talk to you about…”
“Neha, right”, she said before I could complete my sentence.
“How do you know this”?
“She had mentioned about you. Even I need to talk to you about her”.
Finally after so many twists and turns, I would be meeting Neha. The lady said she had planned to return after three days but since my matter was urgent she would return the next day. She didn’t give me any details over the phone but she said she has something to hand over to me.
After talking to her, one thing was sure though Neha didn’t live there I could get the details about her. At least she had mentioned about me. That concludes even she considers me as her friend. My gut feeling about her presence around me was proved to be true. One more night to spend and I will be meeting Neha.
I went to the nearby motel and checked in for the night. I called Anurag to inform him about my stay. That night I had seen something in Neha’s eyes which wanted to tell so many things. Now I understand that she wanted to tell her true identity. Now there was no stopping me. Let her be in any part of India, I would go and bring her back. I would never let her go this time.
“Wow, that’s great news Sunil. I am so happy for you”, said Sapna when I told her about the news.
“I am super excited Sapna. Finally tomorrow I will be getting her details. If she has mentioned about me then the senior in-charge would definitely give me her whereabouts”.
“Its good that you decided to stay back Sunil and I am sorry for asking you to come back”.
“Don’t embarrass me Sapna. If not for your support I would have never made it till here”.
“But still, at one point I felt like you to return”.
“That’s because you love me. Now come on don’t be sorry and smile”.
“Ya, I am smiling now”.
“Did your brother reached”?
“Yes he came just an hour back. He was asking about you”.
“What did you say”?
“I just said that you have some important business meeting and would be coming back in two days”.
“I am so sorry you have to do all this. It’s our wedding and……”.
“Now see, who is being sorry”.
We talked for some more time and finally hung up. After I had set out on this search operation, me and Sapna never really had long conversations. It has been two weeks now but luckily these two weeks didn’t go waste. I was thinking about all the ways I had approached to find Neha.
I didn’t had any information about Neha except for her name when I started this search. I had scanned so many colleges to find her. I had never searched for anyone in my life the way I had tried to find out Neha. She had said money can’t buy everything which proved true in my case. Not a single penny of my wealth helped me to find Neha.
Tomorrow will be a new day. I was very excited. I have so many things to talk to her. I am not sure if she will be happy to see me or not but yes she will definitely be shocked that I came searching for her. She would not have expected that I would track her down so soon. My heart is filled with excitement and waiting to see the sunrise.
The next morning I got ready and went to the orphanage centre to meet the senior in-charge. She had asked me to come around 9am. As I entered the office, the lady who had misbehaved with me the previous day apologised for her behaviour and asked me to have a seat.
I took my seat and I could hear someone addressing me and I turned around,
“Good morning Mr Sunil, I am Mrs Parvathi Kumar. How are you”?, the senior in-charge lady introduced herself.
Mrs Parvathi Kumar was an elderly lady in her late 50s. She was a very well dressed lady in a saree, her hair neatly tied, black eyes, medium built and about 5.5 feet tall.
“Good morning Mam, I am good and thanks for coming back early”.
She indeed had helped me heaps by returning early from her hometown.
“No issues and I am sorry on behalf of my staff. Actually few days back there occurred an unlikely incident because of which the rules are very strict here now”.
“Oh, what happened”? I had to pretend of not knowing.
“Well that’s a long story, doesn’t concern you anyhow. So how did you get here”?
“That too is a very long story Mam. You said you also wanted to talk to me about Neha”.
“Oh yes, few months back she had mentioned about an outing you both had”.
“Really!!! I thought she would have forgot about that day”.
“And why did you think so Mr Sunil”?
“Well with all the research I made about her to get here made me feel like she is a very reserved girl, talkative but don’t believe in making friends. She makes you feel you know about her but yet she seems to be entirely different at times”.
Mrs Kumar agreed with my words but she said Neha was entirely different in her early years.
“What you are saying is true Mr Sunil but Neha was not the same always. She was a young and bubbly girl. She was a new born baby when she had come to this orphanage. Her mother died while delivering her and her father was a drunkard and had no job. He left her here saying he can’t take care of her”, said Mrs Kumar.
“That’s a very tragic story. Does she know about all this”?
“No, we never told her anything. She was one of my favourite girl. It was very easy upbringing her. She always used to be happy and friendly with everyone. She had lot of friends and everyone liked her very much. She used to bond with everyone and had high attachments”.
“I am not sure of attachments but yes she is indeed a very friendly person”.
Mrs Kumar couldn’t stop telling me all about Neha and her childhood days. She said Neha was a very bright girl and started to tell about her achievements during her school days be it in studies or in extra curricular activities.
“From what you are saying I can realise that she is indeed one of your favourite girl”, I said to Mrs Kumar.
“Yes Mr Sunil, her presence would lighten up the whole centre. Not only me she was everyone’s favourite”.
“But how did you recognise me in an instant”?
“When Neha told me about you, she also said that you will be coming tracking her. But I had never expected you to see here so soon”.
“She really said that, I don’t believe”.
“She considered you as a nice person and a friend too which I think is true. You had only her name but still you made it till here. Only a true friend can do this”.
“She is the one who changed by life Mrs Kumar. I was leading a very robotic life but she filled my life with colours, emotions, attachments and values. I don’t have any friends till date but only her”.
“She would have been very lucky to have a friend like you Mr Sunil”.
“From a long time I am seeing you are using only past tense about her which means she has moved out from here right”?
Mrs Kumar took a deep breath before she could continue. I felt that she was trying to say something but was struggling with her words.
“What happened Mrs Kumar? Is Neha here or moved out and if moved out, then can you please share her details”?
“Just a second Mr Sunil. I will get the cover she has left for you”.
Mrs Kumar went inside and I was sitting there and wondering when will my wait would finally come to an end.
“Here Mr Sunil, this is the cover she has left for you”, said Mrs Kumar.
“This looks like some letter. Anyways where is she now Mrs Kumar. Can I get her address”?
“I am very sorry to inform you Mr Sunil but Neha is no more. She was diagnosed with cancer and she passed away about 2 and a half months back”, Mrs Kumar wiped her tears after conveying the unfortunate message to me.
I was sitting there numb with no reaction. I was only listening to what she was saying but nothing was making sense to me.
Mr Sunil, Mr Sunil!!!! Are you ok”? Mrs Kumar asked me by shaking me.
“What you said just now……”, I asked recovering my senses.
“Yes Mr Sunil, its true. I know its hard to believe. She was diagnosed with blood cancer in her first year of college. Doctors had started treatment on her and given some hopes. But then she slowly started to detach from her friends. She remained friendly but she didn’t keep any attachments”.
“So that was the reason she left the college”?
“Yes, because by the end of second year doctors realised that she will not make it. So she wanted to lead rest of her life here with us”.
“The other night it seemed she wanted to tell something but I never realised it could be this fatal”.
“Life is so unpredictable Mr Sunil. We had never imagined that such a lovely girl would depart from us so soon”.
Collecting the letter from Mrs Kumar I left from the centre with a heavy heart. I was in pain but there was not a single drop of tear in my eyes. I wanted to cry and shout but was not able to. I wanted to curse god for taking away such a beautiful person from this world that too at a tender age. I was still in a shock and was not able to digest that a girl who had changed my life has left her own life.
A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who means a lot to you only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and you just have to let go.
“Hello, Sapna”? I called her number.
“Sunil, what happened, did you meet that lady”?
“I am coming back Sapna. I will tell you everything when I get there”.
“But did you get any details about Neha”?
“Yes, I can’t tell you anything now. We will talk when I reach there”.
I looked at the letter in my hand which was the only memory of Neha.
“Hey Dude,
Now that you are holding this letter you very well know that I have played my last innings. While getting here you also have known many information about me. I know I had lied to you about my identity on that day but I am not sorry for that. I didn’t wanted anyone to sympathise me for who I am because I don’t feel sorry for me. We all are different. We always can’t get everything in life. Instead of longing for something which you don’t have why can’t we be just happy with what we have. At times I used to feel bad when I used to see children being cuddled by their parents but then I saw there are also people who struggle every day of their life to have one decent meal a day. In comparison to them I am far more in a better position. This orphanage has given me shelter to live, food to eat, clothes to wear, friends to talk to and education to come up in life. What more could I have asked for. I don’t think my own parents could have provided me with these facilities. Then why should I complain or why should anyone else sympathise me.
In schools it was not under my control but when I joined college and stayed in hostel I requested the principal not to disclose my identity to anyone, not even the staff or lecturers and hence I told all my college mates that I was from Goa. I always loved making new friends and going to new places. Bangalore was also one such place for me. I was enjoying my life when I came to know about my disease. For one moment I lost my senses but again I thought this is also the part of life. Doctors had given me hopes that I could survive if I take proper treatment. I didn’t lose hope and continued by life accordingly. But I didn’t keep any close attachments with anyone. Then I met Vishal in my second year. He was the one about whom I had mentioned you. He was a very nice guy and I had crush on him since first year. He also used to stare at me but I didn’t wanted to get close to him because of my cancer. The more I tried to stay away from him, the more he came close to me. One fine day he proposed me. I was on top of the world. I really did love him but I was not in a position to accept his proposal.
He knew I liked him and he was crazy about me. Instead of turning down his proposal and giving him the reason, I accepted with the condition that there would be nothing serious between us. He readily agreed for that. I had some wonderful moments with him. He was the first person to touch me. He was the first one with whom I realised meaning of love. He loved me selflessly. Vishal wanted to have serious commitment with me but then I broke off with him. It was not easy for me but I didn’t wanted him to long for me because I knew I would not make it because by the end of my second year doctors realised that no treatment could save me. For one week I remained depressed. I wanted to live and have a beautiful life with Vishal but again as I said we all are different. We get only what we are destined for. After many sleepless nights I finally decided that I am not going to die like this. I would make every moment of my life special. I would lead rest of my life in such a way that even death would feel ashamed. I decided to cut off my studies. That day when we had met I had come to bid final good bye to my friends.
When I met you I realised that you are not very happy in your life. You had everything but yet you were not enjoying your life. That’s why I decided to stick to you and show you the real meaning of life. To my surprise you slowly started to enjoy my company. That one day spent with you was a memorable day to me as well. I was happy that I was able to make you realise that happiness always relies in smallest things. Happiness is not always about any business deals or buying expensive things but its about helping others and being the reason for others happiness. You realised these things and with each passing hour your attitude was changing. I might have lied to you about my identity but the things that I shared with you was genuine and from my heart. When I was parting from you I felt like telling you everything but again you would have felt bad for me and would have tried to help me in every possible way. I didn’t wanted that. I didn’t wanted you to think that I told all those things because I was dying. No I shared all those things because I meant it. You said you would come back to track me and believe me I knew you would come.
I knew I would not be alive by the time you find me. That’s the reason I am writing you this letter. Please don’t ever be sorry for me. I would always want you to remember me as a bubbly young girl not some grief stricken girl. I know by now you would be a changed man and I am happy that I could change someone’s perspective about life. Please remain the same. Life is very unpredictable and don’t waste it in unnecessary materialistic happiness. Live your life to fullest and always be compassionate towards others. Be happy and contended with what you have. Don’t strive for something because someone else have it. I will be always in your memories and yes convey my regards to your fiancee Sapna and I wish you a very happy married life in advance. One more thing if we are destined to meet in next life we will meet.
Your loving friend,
Neha”.
***
“Hey Sunil, so good to see you back”, said Sapna hugging me as soon as I entered the house.
“How did the meeting go Sunil, all good”? her Dad asked me.
“Oh let him have some rest at least, no more business talks now”, said Sapna’s Mom.
“Welcome back Sunil, seeing you after a long time. You go and get some rest, we will have a party later at night”, said Sapna’s brother.
I straight away went to room after taking their leave.
“Is everything alright Sunil, where is Neha, didn’t you find her and…..”? Sapna asked me seeing me lying on the bed.
“Here, read this letter. I will have a shower and come”.
I was not in a position to tell her about Neha’s death. Even though I had told Sapna about Neha and her personality I wanted her to know Neha through her own words. This would give a better picture about her.
I was deeply touched after reading her letter. I had tears in my eyes but I didn’t wanted to insult her by crying. I was missing her and feeling bad because a girl with such a beautiful thought had to depart so early from her life. She was way too knowledgeable for her age but I am happy that she spent her last days with grace and not by grief. She was someone who had thorough knowledge about true purpose of life. There are so many people around us who struggle everyday to make a living and we who have every luxury still thrive for something more. She didn’t had any home but she accepted her orphanage as her home, she considered Mrs Kumar as her own mother, she found siblings in other girls over there. She was true that her parents indeed run orphanage. She had so many reasons to feel lonely and depressed but she took these things with a positive attitude and always remained happy with whatever she had thinking it as god’s gift. Again she taught me true meaning of life and I thank god for that “ONE DAY OUT” with her.
**
AFTER FEW MONTHS
“Sapna, are you ready? We are getting late now”, I call out for Sapna.
“Have patience my dear. I am almost done”.
“I guess you didn’t take so long to get ready in our wedding as well”.
“You keep blabbering. See I am ready. Shall we go now”?
“Hey, you are looking gorgeous”.
“You are also not bad”.
It is Anurag’s wedding. I had to personally talk to both his and his girlfriend’s parents and they finally gave their consent. In fact they are very happy about the match.
My wedding also went very well. I was depressed for a while but then again I took it with positive attitude just like Neha and everything became so easy. I agree there are so many things to worry about but everything can be solved just by having positive attitude.
“Hello”? I answer my call and it was Mrs Kumar who wanted to meet me and was waiting at my office.
“Good morning Mrs Kumar, how are you today”? I greet her.
“I am very well Mr Sunil. Sorry to drop here without an appointment”.
“Don’t embarrass me now Mrs Kumar, please take your seat. This is Sapna, my wife and Sapna this is Mrs Kumar. I have told you about her”.
“Oh yes, nice meeting you Mrs Kumar. Sunil always tells about you of what a wonderful person you are”, says Sapna.
“He is being too generous. In fact its because of him that we are able to have so many facilities at our orphanage now”.
“You are again embarrassing me now”.
“No Mr Sunil, its true. Your generous donation is supporting us to a great extent”.
“Ok, I take that. May I know your purpose of visit”? I ask her.
“Next month we are having a small annual function like every year. We want you to be the chief guest”.
“Me and chief guest”!!!
“Yes Mr Sunil and we would appreciate if you could also join him Mrs Sunil”.
I accept her invitation for the annual function. We then proceed to attend the wedding.
I wanted to open an orphanage centre but then I decided to donate funds to Neha’s orphanage and many such organisations. This I was not doing only for the sake of Neha but also for my own happiness.
“Happy married life, bless you both”, me and Sapna congratulate Anurag and his better half.
“Thank you very much Sir, we both owe you”.
“If so, then promise me one thing”.
“What is it Sir”?
“Just live your life to fullest”.
Life and death are evident. Coming into this world is not in our hands but we could make our departure a memorable one to others. That is what Neha did. She made her death a beautiful memory by the way she lead her life. She may not be here with me now but she will always be there in my heart as my true friend and a well wisher.
When life gives you hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have thousand reasons to smile. Dream what you what to dream, go where you want to go and be what you want to be because you have only one life to do all the things you want to do. This is the way of life.
“A DAY OUT” indeed was an unforgettable and a memorable one. We all meet different people each day but very few like Neha leave a deep impact on us.
–END–
