She could feel nothing but the warmth of the tears drenching her face. The letter still tightly clutched in her hands, she trembled, she felt that she won’t ever know how to breathe again. She could never move on. But she had to, right? That’s what he asked; if at all she was under any obligation to listen to him. Now the question that hovered, was, would she? Why this? Why now…..Maybe there wasn’t time enough to answer it, she would have to see him, once, even if for the very last time.
The trail of thoughts seeped deeper into her, killing her, making her bleed, and all she could do was rush; rush against time; rush for him. That moment when they stood in solitude embracing, they were there, alone, losing track of time, neither of them wanting to let go, both knowing that they would eventually have to. Later, Neal walked her home, she didn’t realize the audacity of it all until she read the letter, that very night. Where would she find him, who would lead her there? She turned the envelope only to gape at the name of the hospital postered on it. There was no turning back.
The placid white walls of that place, seemed like a shroud, a death metaphor. It was a sting that tore her soul apart, she moved like a shadow through the building scanning every room on her way, until she came across him. She could hardly do anything, she felt relieved and scared. People around were asking her, trying to stop her from going any further, maybe eventually they did but it was worth it, the peace in his sight gave her the answer, “yes its true, I knew you would come” ,and then it was over. He was gone.
Those were the last things she remembered before the world turned demonishly black strangling her senses till she surrendered to its vastness.
The horizon ahead was trying to shake off the last memories of darkness. She wondered whether her decision would wear off her own as well. Its has been ages since, she’s been in it, and now when all of it was about to disappear; she was scared.
She felt herself smiling at her own truth, the letter he wrote her was still the same; the paper, ink, words, all of it. Just the time had changed. The answers were known, no more doubts, no more queries.
“We live for responsibilities”, Neal had once said, and now twenty years later, she felt she was finally through with them. She could be with him now, even if through death. She felt like sharing with him, the answer she had figured out; she wasn’t sure if it was right, but she knew that it eventually would be……Love is all about being with someone you care, if that means waiting for a thousand years then be it so, but she had chose the second . And that was it. They just had to be together.
The sun woke up with all its glory, freeing her from the enclosing mist, she felt light, she was glad. She looked down from the cliff, and saw that her sky was huge, vivid with variations, losing there wouldn’t be difficult.
She stretched her arms wide, waiting to fly, the air seemed so fresh. It was a fresh start, a new beginning…and then……she let go.
As she soared higher in the sky of her own, she felt no pain. She could almost see him there, at last she could breathe him…All was magical, her smile…his love and their story.
Defying gravity was never her option, it was always destiny….