Article – HOW MUCH YOU DO FOR WARDS
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How you will do it is not as easy as you think about it, too difficult, if not impossible, at the early age of your wards – here particularly your sons and daughters.
I have seen many of my friends, colleagues, relatives, kith and kin, and neighbors living with or not when their babies are of 2/3 years of age start thinking about their admission to one of the good schools of the town or city where they work and live at.
For that the parents ask from their near and dear ones. They visit the schools also to know their teaching standard, their result mainly in tenth and twelfth boards’exams. The quality of staff, qualification and experience of teaching staff and moreover the reputation the schools hold in respect of selection of students in national level prestigious institutions/universities/colleges like IITS, NITS, IIIT, AIIMS, New Delhi, VMCH, Army Medical College & Hospital, Pune, IIS, Bengaluru, ISM,Dhanbad and so on …
Besides all as explained above NDA, Union Civil Services, IES, IFS etc. about which some of the parents think for their wards.
As a teacher and executive in a senior position in one of the largest public sectors of the country, associated with a number of institutions/organisations/trusts/committees/schools and colleges and the people of different caste, creed and blood of lower, middle and higher levels of standard of living holding the posts from peons to that of Chief Executive Officers in private & public sectors and even in state and central Governments,what I realised that most of the parents do not take care of their wards at their early ages mean to say about their early education. The moment their wards are admitted to the highly reputed and prestigious schools in nursery, prep one or so, the parents particularly the fathers become almost free of worries.
I have seen the mothers much more worried about their children’s education, much more careful about their children’s education by getting up earlier, preparing the kids – school bags, lunch boxes, water bottle, homework copies, all prescribed books, pens and pencils, ultimately taking them to the bus stops. I want to make it clear that not all mothers do such duties and take care properly in such a way, but most of them do it very sincerely and there is no exaggeration to say that such mothers are repaid by their wards afterwards in life.
This story is about the parents and their wards-here about their sons and daughters only. Parents include father and mother only. It is my bitter experience that most of the fathers do not spare time for their wards when they are in nursery and prep one. They think the moment their wards are admitted to the reputed/prestigious schools, their duty and responsibility is over, they have nothing to do with, the schools will teach them and moreover their mothers are there to take care of their babies. ABCDEF, 123456 – what is to be done with these alphabets and numbers, school teachers what for, mother at home what for, for such a simple thing, what is my necessity, not at all. Such parents keep themselves quite away from their wards in connection with their study. They don’t have the time, rather have the time for gossiping, have the time for overstaying in the offices, going to movie, going to hotels/restaurant, attending parties, meetings, seminars, criticizing the people for of no avail etc.
Moreover they never see what their children are reading and how they are performing in their classes, never serious about their day to day progress. Even for a hour or two even on week days they don’t sit with them, see their books, copies, even the instructions that are given to the parents to follow, see and reply suitably about the routine tests/examinations taken by the schools and remarks made by them about their children.
It is the right time when children require friendly love and affection, it is the right time when children need proper care and attention in nourishment, it is the right time when children deserve regular guidance and monitoring in their study in school as well as at home. Here is the foundation of building career of the children, here is the base that can be strengthened to compete all India tests/exams. In later stages of study. We always talk of basic education of the children for instance where studied in primary ages, basic knowledge how strong it is when they study at the primary stage.
Fathers ought to involve themselves regularly in their children’s study as well as in indoor and outdoor games and sports which these can bring them closer, know each other better, can talk freely and fearlessly, can share the problems arising out of study in classes and at home.
At early age children have better memory power, extremely curious to know about the things they see, touch, hear and read in the books etc., their grasping capacity and capability horizontally and vertically are very high, sometimes beyond our imagination particularly when they put some typical questions/queries from us and very often we fail to answer suitably.
At early age their performance in the school is somehow or other is excellent or very good as their syllabus is concise / limited and they are properly taken care of in schools by their teachers and at home by mother or father or by both. In most of the convent/English medium schools in lowest/lower classes such as nursery, prep one , prep two or KG- I and KG- II, grades like A,B, C, D are given to the students in the test/examinations they appear periodically – may be weekly, monthly, quarterly, half yearly or yearly. As I have come across most of the students get A grade, a few B grade and the least C grade.
The parents are very happy with the excellent result of their wards, no problems anywhere in performance of the students. In fact problems start with the promotion of the children to higher classes – to Prep – I ( KG- I ), Prep II ( KG – II ), Class – I , Class – II and so on… – problems go on increasing and increasing. I mean to point it out that the performance of the most of the boys/girls tend to decrease, marks in the tests/examinations are not excellent or very good, it is limited to over average or average. How it happens is a matter of thinking, finding out the reasons behind the downfalls in performance of the students. The higher the classes, the lower the performance. As a teacher and father what I have found, analysed and concluded are as follows:
1. Increase in subjects.
2. Increase in the syllabus
3. Irregularity in study
4. Lack of punctuality
5. Lack of proper attention & guidance
6. And so on…
Here is the important role of father if not from nursery must be from prep – I or KG – I up to higher classes his wards are promoted year after year to class tenth and then tenth + two.
Father must be vigilant actually what the syllabus is, how many subjects are there carrying how many marks in theory and practical, what are the different chapters and exercises in each chapter, questions in each chapter, types of such questions – easy and typical ones.
In classes students are taught all courses one by one and the questions are asked in the tests/examinations out of the portions that are taught to them. Herewith father should spare some time regularly in the evening or at night with their wards, be face to face to know what has been taught to him – which subjects and what portion of the courses of study (syllabus), to see whether any home work has been given and if so has it been done or is there any problem to work it out?
Normally in such schools only 5 days classes are held, two days are holidays. Working parents are also free on holidays they are granted.
Parents should guide and assist their wards in study regularly, sit, talk, discuss, solve the problems/sums, prepare the answers of the questions wherever needed.
Holidays do not mean that the wards should be left free, allowed to loiter here and there of no avail. Wherever and wherein the wards are lagging behind or for better command in the subjects father should sit with their wards and encourage them to study even one step farther.
Parents – father and mother should keep watch on the performance of their wards in their weekly, monthly, quarterly, half yearly and annual tests/examinations. Each test and examination is related to one another.
I am of the opinion if you are serious about your wards’ weekly test and get him /them well prepared for, they can do better even excellent in the weekly tests, if in weekly tests, why not in monthly tests, if in monthly tests, why not in quarterly tests, if in quarterly tests, why not in half yearly examination, if in half yearly examination, why not in annual examination?
Parents should motivate their wards, encourage them, create interest in them to read, understand, grasp, get by heart, have mastery over the subjects, the related chapters & exercises, the questions and their answers by way of regular study and practice.
The parents as well as their wards will have to make great sacrifice and only with the great sacrifice great achievements can be made. I am not telling it, it is one of the most important quotations of our great man of the country – Swami Vivekananda.
I want to prove it with only two instances I personally came across in my life.
First Instance : Mr. Singh was a peon in a central Govt. office where I used to visit regularly for official job. I had to see the Regional Commissioner every time for discussion. M. Singh was the peon of RC. I had to talk to Mr. Singh about RC’s availability. I had to send a slip for permission to see him. Sometimes I had to wait outside. I found Mr. Singh always sincere and active in his duty. He never saw left or right, up or down, he saw straight what was his duty and how far he was performing it sincerely in the interest of the office.
One day I lost my patience and asked Mr. Singh about the secrecy of his good health, what his daily routine of work, how many members were there in the family? In one breath I put before him a number of unusual questions.
He said he was concerned with his duty only, nothing else. He did it with sheer sincerity. He attended his office well in time and left well in time. He had a small family, small quarter, but satisfied with all that he had had. He had good cows and sold milk in excess of their own consumption. He had two sons reading in schools. He taught them regularly, sat, saw their homework, solved their sums/proplems,kept watch on their performance. He was not merely father but became their good friends, lived and led like that in their study as well as in their games and sports, even in gossiping. Mr. Singh always encouraged his wards to go upward in result, and they did it , never looked backward.
Dear friends! One of his sons did B.Tech ( Mining ) from ISM, Dhanbad and another MBBS from some reputed Medical College & Hospital of the country.
Second Instance : In 1969-70 I was working in Planning & Development Division , Sindri. One of my bosom friends Shri SN Jha took me to see one of the relatives in BIT hostel adjacent to our dormitory. Meet Mr. BK Jha He is the topper in his class. B. Tech. in BIT, Sindri. He is the ex – student of Netarhat.
Where does he hail from? What is his father?
He hails from my village in Monghyr. His father is an executive in Railways blessed with four sons, all are genius, all three are in Netarhat school.
Behind it is his father, he does his duty very sincerely, attends his duty in time and leaves in time, he is not interested in anything else other than guiding and teaching his wards. He comes back, sits with his children, teaches each one turn by turn and takes test and exams regularly in order to know to what extent they have grasped and to what extent they have performed in the tests/exams.,taken by him regularly without fail.
The eldest one held the post of DRM, another doctor and so on… I do not think it necessary to explain how their wards – one and all did excellent not merely in study but in career also, but what they did did because their father spared time in guiding them properly, made sacrifice of many things… !
My dear friends! Please place your both hands together on your chest where your heart beats round the clock even without rest for a few minutes to keep you alive and tell me sincerely how much you do for your wards.
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Writer: Durga Prasad, Bich Bazar, GTRoad, Gobindpur,Dhanbad
Date: 3rd. November 2014. Day: Monday, Time: 7.18 PM
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